So you decided to skip the part that talks about what the previous governor did and how he inherited an unsustainable budget that was created off the back of unsustainable revenues? Because I actually paid attention to the article, and that was pretty clear.

love it.

but if you want the short answer, it’s that former governor Bobby Jindal boned everything.

Welcome to Deadspin 2.0. Or is it 3.0 now?

You want to send free stuff to someone who got yelled at?

NAAAASSSSSSIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMM PPPPEEDDDDDRRAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Dude, you can’t be that bad if you made a friggin practice squad haha.

I think I absolutely fall into that category, unfortunately.

Psi Useless living up to its name.

Haha that was part of the reason I mentioned playing defensive end (I added the laadeedaaa so people wouldn’t think I was bragging, but, alas, of course I’m being accused of that). The fact that he is able to process it that quickly is what blew me away. If that was me, it’d have been a sack but not a game changing…

When I was playing football in high school I had to take a shit during a game. I played fullback and we ran a dive play on 1st and goal. I proceeded to score, drop the ball, and run directly into the locker room. We were playing at a stadium built about 10,000 years ago with stalls the size of a shoebox. I didn’t have…

I know that play is more iconic because of the timing and Cam not going for the fumble, but as a former collegiate defensive end (WELL LADEEDAAAA) his strip sack for the touchdown in the first quarter is one of the best defensive plays I’ve ever seen. To beat a tackle that badly then have the wherewithal to process…

Stassi’s storyline might be my favorite thing that’s happened on Vanderpump Rules. No talent hack quits her job as a waitress because she’s destined for greatness then comes crawling back with her hands out once she realizes that being a no talent hack on a reality show is the only thing she’s good at.

The worst part is these bros will pay their fine, see their Instagram follower numbers go up, then think it was allllll worth it with no shame whatsoever.

Yeah I’m not sure what about this would surprise people. Pro athlete? Check. 2% body fat? Check. Money? Check. Hands and feet that translate to a teenager’s arm in his pants? Check.

Regulation time:

“There is no shortage of horrific details, and more were added at last night’s vigil.”

I’m sorry...what? He contributed to a crime? Now everyone who witnesses a crime is contributing to it? That’s the slipperiest slippery slope that’s ever worn a pair of slippers.

Based on what grounds? He gave the car keys to the owner of the car. That is his job. No more, no less. Should he have called police from a moral standpoint? Yes. Would that stand up in court? No way. He’s a friggin valet man.

Yeah, I mean I guess anything is possible in today’s America, I just don’t see what recourse they would have to sue the hotel. It’s not the valet’s responsibility to prevent any of what happened. In fact, they’re probably told to do absolutely nothing. Now, if it’s her car and Manziel is asking for the keys, that’s a…