I have not stopped watching, but, and I’ve thought about this a lot, it’s only because I’m old and boring and I know the NFL’s going to be there for me on Sundays. I would not miss the NFL if it goes away, but for as long as it’s around and I’m around I’m probably there for the NFL on Sundays, too.

Just wanted to say nicely done to the person who came up with the “Dreaded Laremy” tag. I and my four garbage sons appreciated it a lot.

Car dealership waiting rooms.

High school Last day before winter break. We went to someone’s house and did gravity hits for the first time. As soon as I took it I knew something was wrong. This was different.

This is going to sound fairly unbelievable, but the first time I got high, I was 13. My parents, foolishly and negligently, allowed me to spend the night at my older brother’s fraternity house. Sidenote, his fraternity chapter was kicked off campus and dissolved by the national organization a few years later due to…

“Spanish-speaking immigrant lollygags at work. Wall does its job.”

There are 69 calories in a “vodka Diet Coke.”

Whoopes!

I don't think Ice House and Red Dog count as microbrews.

Gabagool?

I almost cut my hair, it happened just the other day. It’s getting kinda long, I could have said it wasn’t in my way.

“Also, Puja is a woman.”

2016 has already robbed me of so many artists who lived the lives I was not brave enough to try.

Adam LaRoche will still be my favorite sports baby.

After seeing Tejada and Kang get their legs snapped last season, I’m okay with the rule. Screw unwritten rules and “playing the game the right way.”

He’s definitely getting a bigger contract than that.

Go Derps

I’m the captain now.

Hey,

So dumb.