"the glass crashed into a bottle of blue curacao, shattering it all over me"

Burt PLEASE WTF ban this dude, maybe immolate him if possible.

Oh choke on a fucking dick, asshole.

Craigslist is cool if you want some virile clumsy guy fresh on the rebound who doesn't understand subtlety but will be happy to nail you a few times. Unfortunately after a few beers he gets those white spit flecks built up in the corners of his mouth.

That cross section is fucking juicy.

You can get grass fed beef in the US.

Haha, I would LOVE to find out that was the case. I saw the friends a few weekends ago and we reminisced about the time that they turned invisible.

Other contenders:

I have been smoking pot for years, but edibles are a different story and I never know quite how I'll react.