Every spring, I try on a long, flowy, bohemian peasant dress. And every year I don’t buy one because it’s too expensive, and I’m not sure it won’t look stupid on my very short, stocky frame. I tried one on today, and as I was hemming and hawing over it, the salesgirl shook her head and said, “no, not for you.” She…
alienqueen
alienqueen
Yeah speak to the management! Are there other people in your building hearing this too? Maybe get some pitchforks.
My 30s have left a lot to be desired healthwise. But you know what happened recently? I figured out how to look good. It only took 32 years and 11 months, but I can finally head out into the world each day knowing that I don’t look like crap. Crazy hair? Tamed. Makeup? No probs. Today I got some pink foils mixed into…
I’m internet dating the most awesome man in the world, who likes me...HE LIKES ME YOU GUYS...
Eat more pies and level up to the next size.
When Christian Bale has to step in and say “Whoa dude!.....come on dude chill you’re being a dick”, then it’s tie to check yourself.
What say we settle this on the runway... Ansolo?
They get their tacos from McDonald’s. It’s called a got-damned hamburger, because I’ll be go-to-hell if my pappy fought on D-Day just so’s that a buncha got-damned illegals could come over here with their spicy foods and weird squigglies over their letters.
“I honestly just want to make myself happy most, and if other people like it, then that’s great. If they don’t, then I’m still happy.”
*sniff* I want that for her / us too!!
During a recent transaction, an elderly woman handed me a twenty and said, with eyes a’twinklin’ “Did you hear they might put a woman on the 20 dollar bill? I’d love to see that before I go...” And then we both melted into a puddle of feelings.
“Keep that p***y tight while I’m gone.”
A very important reminder that the (future) top doctor in our nation once made me pose with her blow-up doll on top of me. Would go back if covered by Kaiser.
Why shouldn’t we all be cool with it? For real, there is nothing Bruce Jenner could do to his own body that would affect my life in any way. He could be a dreads-wearing trans woman with 8 nose rings, gigantic breasts, a tattooed face, and a tail... it would not change my life ONE BIT. Best wishes to him.
He kinda needs to be taking care of Kylie. All those plastic surgeries, no school and 25 year old boyfriend at 17? Nobody’s taking care of that girl. I’m all for him finding happiness, but he’s forgetting he’s still a dad to an underage girl making all the wrong choices.
Watching someone else play video games is the actual 9th circle of hell.
Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know