I always read these all smug that I would never be that awful customer...but then I remember I was behind the Great Chili Request of 1993. When I was an insufferable 11 year old vegan I apparently (I don't even remember being this dumb) asked a restaurant if I could get an order of Texas chili without the meat. Now no…

One of my very favorite moments, god bless The Simpsons. (Where's my discount?!)

Fortunately I have not. This just confirms my suspicions, the cutest animals are often the biggest assholes.

that is exactly what I thought to myself when I read the penguin pool line..."I'd do that." Drunk swimming with penguins sounds pretty damn awesome to me.

ugh, this is my childhood. In our case it was a few days before Christmas, the mistress no one knew about called out of the blue, screaming at my mother that she was pissed because my father was planning on spending part of Christmas morning at our house (only a small part, and no one wanted him there to begin with).…

"Those group selfies are always AWFUL. Everyone looks so stupid in them, and there's always one person looking like they have three chins."

We save our prudery for others. I can pool sex all I want, but I'll sure as hell look down on my neighbors for doing the same!

this is excellent information! My forever nervous feral rescue has come so far in the 9 months she's lived with me, but I'm still the only human she will let anywhere near her, and even I can't be trusted 100% of the time apparently because she will still run in terror and hide for hours if I seem too eager to give…

"No one gives a shit about your Butters"

My best friend's parents growing up slept in separate rooms (on different floors even). I remember thinking it was odd at the time, but my boyfriend and I have been together 10+ yeas and still don't live together so who am I to judge...

This I not an insane mark up at all, it's pretty middle of the road for "artisan" jewelry in this style. This isn't a hobbyist on etsy, you are purchasing from a business reselling another businesses products. These people are trying to make a profit, while employing multiple people and being fairly paid for their…

it makes me really sad too, because the whole thing just screams "am I cool now?!" In that just-one-of-the-boys-'cause-other-girls-are-dumb way. I spent my teens and most of my 20s being that person, and I was so miserable and sad and unhappy with myself. :|

WHY CANT I LOOK AWAY 😳

ok, this is the cutest thing I've ever seen and now I have to follow yet another cat on Instagram.

30 for me too. I wasted so much time in my 20s trying to be what other people wanted me to be. Fuck you 20s, my IDGAF 30s have been the best decade of my life (so far)!

it's not the software that's going to be the issue. Sales tax is a pain in the ass to report and pay, not difficult but just an annoying waste of time to deal with. It's manageable for small mom and pop businesses when it's just one state, it takes me about 30 minutes to file & pay mine each month, annoying but…

you should feel fancy compared to me, I have a big ass vase full of flowers & eucalyptus from the farmers market that is at least a week past it's prime. They should have been thrown out days ago, many days ago, it's embarrassing.

what?! I never cared for him, but I couldn't quite figure out my irrational hatred...nowI know exactly why, cat-stealing bastard.

The price complaining is why I fucking hate reading local restaurant reviews. It's right there on the menu, if you don't want to pay it don't eat there!

the Passages Malibu commercial mystifies me. It always comes on TBS in the middle of the day during Fresh Prince reruns. Is that their target audience, some still in their pajamas in the middle of the day watching 90s sitcom reruns and stuffing their face full of "natural" Cheetos? I get the feeling fancy rehab is…