Yes, but that dude clearly knows how to close the deal.

“As if gamma accidents, radioactive bug bites, only one eye patch shop in Los Angeles, Coulson trying to unionize, Maria Hill not shutting up about how HIMYM is going to stick the landing, Justin Hammer’s cost overruns, the radioactive bugs coming out of Pym’s old lab, helicarrier fuel costs, and assorted mutants…

Beat an opponent by 88 points? Jordan would have gotten it to 100.

“...that is a beautiful young man. Also, my National security Advisor. A lot of people don’t know this, but you can pick up strategic and foreign policy expertise from PS4 while streaming Battlerstar Galactica. Oh, yeah, he’s going to be head of the Space Force.”

Bolton’s gone. Who’s going to advise Trump on this existential threat?

It helped that I was actually a D-backs fan, but making fun of Yankees fans (who had been loud and obnoxious as hell [i.e., Yankees fan] up until that bloop single) is a great memory from that night.

I was stationed in Louisiana for a couple of years. The entire state is that kid in 7th grade shop class screaming “you’re a fag!” at anyone smarter than him, accessorizing with a stars-and-bars t-shirt and an LSU cap.

Hardy’s a decent choice. I don’t actually care who plays Simon Williams, but I better get Wonder Man and Beast Do Las Vegas in Phase 6.

That dude Joe Don Baker played in Living Daylights was more financially, politically and strategically savvy than anyone in than Trump White House. That dude Joe Don Baker played in GoldenEye and Tomorrow Never Dies is more personable then anyone in the Trump White House.

There’s believable connections here: I can see Sophia and Yoda doing brunch, you know Papa Palpatine was getting with Blanche, and those Dorothy/Lando rumors!

I know the Marines are Semper Hard On for this guy, and he may have been great tactically, but once he was in the world of the politicians/businessmen he just stroked whoever he needed to for career/$$$. His rep is completely compromised, and he has no moral ground to stand on, but he’s “military!” and so he’ll still…

“Antonio Brown and the Patriots reached agreement on a 1-year deal worth up $15 million that includes a $9 million signing bonus, and dedicated airbrush artist for his helmet, per source. AB has to pay for his own watcher when he goes to the cryo place, though.”

C’mon, these are cadets. Let them enjoy almost winning on a clearly delineated field before they hit the real world. It will be bad enough when the current class gets graduated early to invade Greenland and wherever it is that hurricanes come from.

Sharpie’s profits are going to spike now, aren’t they? The Cult of Trump will buy a dozen each. Not to write with (they can’t), or draw with (crayons). To sniff.

“Too proud and embarrassed to call it off”: the rallying cry of the GOP! The Iraq War was warranted!

I’m all for the Raiders looking like a drunken clown show, but allowing Steelers fans to seem “right”? There’s got to be a line.

What the hell are these parents complaining about? That’s free child discipline conditioning!

Remind everyone that Russia is the majority stockholder in our leader.

She’s a pro. With a brain. And I’m sure it’s not the first time she’s heard some guy who’s “played the game” say something idiotic because it’s a mantra he’s been taught for so long that it’s no longer subject to rational scrutiny.

Drew must have a hot brunch date with the wife. Or he rolled over, hit “publish”, and is now deeply back in the Dreamlands where Brady is chased by nameless horrors and the Vikes only suck on alternating years.