oh my god all of you making me laugh in this thread

ugh f u for making me laugh! :| poor lady.

Jesus fucking Christ on a CROUTON.

Ughhhhh all the crab pictures are gross, go away crabs

I wish there was some way to get a mass Jezebel viewing party for this. And also to not pay for it.

I'm just destined to have a "vanilla" sex life.

"the BDSM lifestyle" barf

+1

If you're seriously "dressing up" to see this "film", please, please, try to get a life. Somehow. Some way.

I remember laughing so hard at that scene the first time I saw it!

If it was Nigella Lawson's recipe for bacon brownies instead (yes, it is a real thing and yes they are fucking amazing), she probs would have gotten the job.

I would contribute to this.

He is hot hot hot hot. I would like a bit of both, please! A veritable New Girl smorgasbord.

MADELEINE I AM AN OCCASIONAL REDHEAD (usually after breakups, so I'm pretty much due for a dye job) AND I WOULD LIKE TO COME

So handsome tho :(

LMFAO. I'm 27 and I can barely afford Chipotle.

I would judge you for this, but I'm more than likely going to be hanging out with the twatface formerly known as alconlad on V Day. He looks like Chris Pratt (pre-ripped bod, though) mixed with Chris O'Dowd. We're probably not going to bone though*, because that would make our sitch even more complicated than it…

I love it so much. The Schadenfreude is delicious. It tastes like fucking tiramisu.

My cat ate a potato chip and barfed it up yesterday.

I just looked at the Twitter results for "female." Brain bleach pls