Fun fact: Cam’s highest-rated skill position player by DVOA during his Super Bowl run was a fullback who was ranked 35th among running backs. 

Cam Newton dresses like he repeatedly takes hard hits to the head for a living. 

That’s bullshit. He absolutely can do something about it. He just won’t. 

There’s a huge psychological advantage to successfully converting on 4th down that isn’t captured by the numbers. I don’t think coaches should always go for it on 4th down, but as someone who used to play defense in high school, being on the wrong end of a 4th down conversion is heartbreaking. 

I was so fucking pissed about that. YOU HAVE AARON FUCKING RODGERS GO FOR IT YOU GODDAMN COWARD. 

This is exactly why idiots think the Trolley Problem is an actual conundrum. DOING NOTHING IS STILL A CHOICE YOU ARE MAKING. 

To be fair, kicking on 4th and 14 is probably statistically defensible. Your chance of getting 14 yards is low enough that the expected points from the field goal is probably higher. 

I agree that his overall stats aren’t really HoF worthy, but how many 2-time Super Bowl MVP’s aren’t in the hall of fame?

If you asked me to picture a QB who goes to Duke in my head, he’s exactly what I would come up with. 

You’re right, Kobe is much worse than those two. Easily the most overrated basketball player of all time. 

Maybe. The Pats going 18-1 will probably be remembered, and they’ve been on a historic tear, so their losses will probably still be remembered fondly. How many 2 time Super Bowl MVPs aren’t in the Hall of Fame? 

I also remember him being mildly amusing on SNL. When asked to recommend an authentic Italian restaurant, he responded with “Olive Garden,” which is legitimately funny because he leaned hard into his dopeyness. 

You know why California has so many homeless people?
A) The climate - it’s a lot easier to avoid hypothermia if it rarely gets below freezing
B) Red states gave bus tickets to California to their homeless people. 

I can name 10 who are better than him off the top of my head.
Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady, Drew Brees, Matt Ryan, Phillip Rivers, Matt Stafford, Patrick Mahomes, Dak Prescott, Ben Rapelsberger, Russell Wilson.

I’m saying this as someone who is actively drunk and therefore has an impaired memory.   

I’m still upset that there’s not a Witcher 3 mod that makes the cats like me so I can pet them. 

This is because Indiana is so shitty, even the South doesn’t want it. I lived in Valparaiso for a year and it was the longest 6 years of my life. 

People wildly underestimate how good D1 athletes are. If you were a decent high school baseball player, you would bat .019 against D1 pitching. Even the worst D1 athlete in a major sport was probably recruited specifically because of how good they were at that sport, and they have an extra 4 years of practice over…

I know Madden isn’t anything like coaching in the NFL, but my play calling skills get marginally better for about a handful of drinks, then decline very rapidly after that. I imagine drunk Belichick would be the same way. Buzzed Belichick would be a good, but more aggressive coach. Blackout Belichick would be calling…

By the time he’s 37, he’s either going to be hilariously bad or aging nicely into 30 year old Aaron Rodgers level. 

He needs to start riding motorcycles again.