Just hope you never end up in a sinkhole, then. That shit is terrifying, and it can happen all too many places.

I don’t recall him ever living up to his own hype. Unless getting into the garbage and picking fights with the family dog counts as “terrorizing the neighborhood”.

Yeah, but getting it approved is a fucking insane, and all too often insulting, process

It would also have been an annoying process to retrofit the tower with sprinklers, just like pretty much any other remodel. Of course, most people would say that the inconvenience would be worth it not to burn your tenants alive, but most people aren’t a goddamn Trump.

While in a fugue state, you’re not thinking rationally. Bobbett attacked the focus of her trauma.

I love Crazy Ex-Girlfriend to death, but, as much as now knowing it’s set to end is breaking my heart, this must be the best path. The only other alternative networks seem to have is running a series into the ground until no one cares anymore (or for the truly misfortunate, running forever, because it’s become a…

Awesome. I first heard about it this weekend, and it sounded so wonderful I was genuinely afraid it might be some asshole’s April Fools Joke.

It figures. The one time Adult Swim broadcasts subbed FLCL, I’m busy.

As a program for death by starvation, or as a diet?

Pronounced “Nexium”? Like the heartburn medication? Sounds like creating a successful cult takes a lot less effort than one would assume.

It doesn’t fucking help that Governor Shitforbrains overruled the state’s two largest cities raising their minimum wage rates. He actually got a state judge to rule that having a “patchwork of different minimum wages” would be detrimental to the state. So, fuck actual cities where the cost of living is higher than the…

The pension system is billions in debt because Frankfort spent the last 20 years not funding it, and then gambling with the money that was in the fund, while keeping the actual investments and companies hired to invest that money secret - losing millions on shady shit, while paying through the nose to reimburse the…

No, Mercer lives for the knowledge that, when he straps on, he has the power to decide who lives and who dies. He couldn’t get off on a video game after that.

I always love the billionaire prepper stories. It makes it easy to remember where they have their bunkers and bugout villas, in the likely event that the poor and the screwed survive long enough after the end of civilization to have a hankering for some canned long pig.

I want it to hit Trump tower. Which I know isn’t in New Jersey, but then most predictions for the tien’s eventual crash don’t put it in New Jersey, either.

Even the dog looks ashamed to be stuck next to him. “He doesn’t speak for me! Also he should have given me a heavier jacket if we were gonna be standing around like this in the cold, instead of marching.”

The christian not-yoga studios might allow it, but they’re already crazy.

I’d go even farther, and say that home protection is a can of heavy-duty pepper spray with a good reach. At least then, when it turns out to be your kid sneaking in late, or your neighbor, drunk and in the wrong home, in the end they’re just pissed at you — not dead or maimed.

There was something about Trump’s lawyer having it killed too, I believe.

Shriveled, orange, and broke as fuck.