“I don’t feel so good,” mutters Corporal Peter Parker as he puts the whisky bottle he used to wash down the fentanyl on the coffee table in front of him. He has to self medicate because the Republicans have defunded the VA and the chronic pain and PTSD he suffers from isn’t getting treated.

C’mon man, you saw all those hits he took last year? He don’t remember shit.

He seems to have learned, he is wildly offensive.

Hey, Cam, remember how you feel when people ask if a black QB can learn the intricacies of an NFL offense?

E.J. Manuel [...] and Connor Cook are the other quarterbacks on Oakland’s roster.

News from next week
“Racist Fan receives Presidential Pardon”

While she’s entitled to her opinion, it’s safe to say I don’t see eye to eyes with Miss Sanders.

So why is he still being tarred with this brush?

Life, uh...finds a way.

He has dementia. Like, objectively. It is NOT going to get better.

Stop writing the 2020 GOP/Trump platform.

North....South....ITS A FUCKING BEAR!

At what point do they just cut bait with this guy?

In a video filled with unexpected twists and bizarre behavior, the absolute most shocking aspect of the video is that our co-star is drinking a Lagunitas IPA and not a Bud Light Lime-a-Rita.

I feel you’re not giving the full story here. The bone spurs were so bad that Donald couldn’t go to Vietnam to fight for his country, even with that military academy background of his, all handsome in those uniforms with the gold braiding and all. The bone spurs were so debilitating that they seem to have affected…

Yea, hi. That’s my ticket.

Whites will guide you to a new home

Trail of tears stream down your face

Looooooooooootta bro-science though.

Oh I’m sorry, were we talking about football or grown men who think wrestling is real?