And our dog never scratched my Dad's car. That was all me.

Hes pretty hideous but ill deal with it.

You are correct: do not buy a dog. ADOPT a dog. As for kids, eh, who needs 'em?

Look at the wittle face. I just want to squeeze it, and smoosh it, and cuddle it, and.... I mean, cute dog bro.

ADOPT a dog, give it a home, and love it forever. This is the proper solution. Also, meet my newest rescue, Captain Button.

Two entire pineapples??? My mouth and tongue are basically covered in infected taste buds and canker sores just hearing about that.

Aw. You poor thing.

Unfortunately, religious folk generally don't care much for science.

Just nobody tell Fox News that the commemorative quote on the 9/11 memorial is about two gay terrorists ... or, if you do, give me time to heat up some popcorn first.

I approve of the quote. Most viewers will understand it to be a kind memorial to the victims, and there's a darker - but important - message for those who are more informed. We should never forget the devastating consequences of mixing fundamentalist religion with desperation.

Yeah, the system will be inherently classist until legal representation becomes accessible and affordable.

I once met a dude from Boston at a music festival who, after sharing a joint with me and my friends and learning we were from Canada, said "Canadian girls are the tits!"

Yes we are, friend. Yes we are.

I am pretty sure what I did was illegal, but hopefully the statute of limitations has expired. I dated an terrible person, when I became pregnant, he told me that he didn't want to hear about it. When I broke up with him he wrote me a long letter detailing all the reasons I should kill myself. He would call, text,…

That's not vengeance. That's justice. Good for you!

I'm not the most eloquent person, but I'm always eager to share two tales from my time working at Wendy's.

I'm a pretty chill person, but one time in college someone took my clothes out of the washing machine and piled them on the floor within minutes of the cycle ending (there was one washer/dryer on the hall). I was annoyed, but put them in the dryer anyway. When I went back later my clothes were back on the floor, still…

If we are going to open up a state to liability for the tortituous acts occurring under its licensing and regulatory schemes there could be a huge problem. Every injury caused by drunk driving death (state regulation of booze ) or a car collision (state issued drivers license) and continuing out from there would…

This is a horrible injury and all, but what does the State of Connecticut have to do with it? Unless she could show that they were negligent in issuing a permit or licensing for the dangerous animal, there's no way this would ever get to a trial.

Surprised it took this long to show up on Jez. The father was told by bother his son, and his daughter, that it was a stranger (the son didn't know who it was). Father didn't shoot until he a) determined he didn't know the kid and b) called 911 and c) only shot after the boy made a move the father saw as…

I agree. And having had a teenage son in this same situation, I was upset when my son got arrested - now I'm just thankful he wasn't shot!