Jfc I had no idea that was a thing. I was going to joke about selling the “digital rights” to my house as an NFT but what I keep learning is that if I really want to get outlandish with my NFT/crypto jokes, I need to get WAY THE FUCK more creative, because they’ve already got something for, like, EVERYTHING. It’s…

THANK YOU

Wait

Because if Q *isn’t* from the future, then how the hell is he gonna tell me which fake crypto Pokémon is gonna be the most valuable when it comes time for my first Lambo???? Please respond Paresh. I’m desperate here and may be in over my head. You know people on here are saying this is all a pyramid scheme???? WTF am…

Wait, *is* Q from the future or am I getting him confused with the plot of Steins;Gate? Please answer, Paresh, you have no idea how badly I need to know

Yeah, you know, just want something to put my kid through college and live off of for the rest of my life. Nothing big. 

I know I’m not going to blow anyone’s mind with this crazy twist, but turns out our good buddy Paresh here barely posts and last time they did it was because they had dOnE tHeIr OwN rEsEaRcH on the Covid vaccines and had come to some pretty fascinating conclusions

Hey, can someone put Narnia on the blockchain? I wanna buy that Ice Queen’s castle as an investment rental property. You know, just normal crypto shit

Fair point. I guess I’d say some insane shit if my my financial well-being were at stake. Of course, I’d like to believe that I would never, ever, for any reason, stake said well-being on being a fake crypto Pokémon landlord. I feel like I would recognize that that investment scheme sounds like a schizophrenic mad-lib…

“[T]hey are the true ‘Blue-Chip’ leaders of P2E NFT-gaming in the Metaverse” is among the absolute funniest things I’ve ever read in my life

I mean, even Paresh’s writing voice is stilted and socially awkward. Why is hit piece in quotes? Is it to denote sarcasm or are they just uncomfortable using the idiom? Claiming that fake Pokémon + crypto “remuneration” (quotation marks added to imply that it is remuneration in name only for the vast majority of…

This has to be a joke. No way someone is this deep into fake crypto Pokémon. I can’t accept that the person who wrote this exists and actually believes this shit.

Currently my favorite Elden Ring character and absolutely the biggest challenge FromSoft has ever created is my 4 month old baby. He demands that my attention and care constantly 24 hours a day and makes it impossible to play ANYTHING. Even if I can get him to nap he’ll only do it in my arms, leaving me at best one…

I mean, the article seems to suggest that Suede is the one who coined “Shopro Gambit.” And he’s a Pokemon anime YouTuber, not a lawyer who specializes in applying sophisticated military tactics to litigation strategy or some shit. I’m sure, to him, being sued in a foreign jurisdiction that he believes would require a…

The way that game companies talk about integrating NFTs into games is basically DLC that players sell each other (while the company takes their cut, of course), so just like DLC inevitably ended up at loot boxes, it was probably inevitable that NFTs would end up at NFT loot boxes. They got there pretty damn fast…

Wait. NFT stands for Non-Fungible Token, that is, a token that is not (non) interchangeable with another (fungible). What the fuck does GFT stand for? Gift-Fungible Token? As in a token that is interchangeable (fungible) with another gift (what I’m assuming the G stands for)? Because if someone ever got me a GFT I…

I get where that impression may have come from, but I assure you I was not. I’m exhausted and trying to get my 7 week old to sleep. I’m a PSL organizer in real life and am not really used to having to defend my leftist credentials in comments on a video game blog because I wasn’t as clear or thorough as I could have…

I actually addressed that in my follow up comment lol. I fully support defunding the police. Like, obviously this comment was a joke. If I have to be constantly serious though: defund police, abolish prisons, shoot landlords, all workers unionize, expel colonizers and imperialists, give back stolen land, pay…

To be clear, I’m not advocating for paying them while they play Pokemon Go all shift. They’d have to do it for free, just like I would if I still played it. I’m just advocating for taking away their guns and badges and cars and pensions and almost impossibly powerful bizzaro-unions and sense of superiority and…

I mean, there are worse things they could have been doing. If catching that Snorlax gives them something to do other than murder black and brown people, I say we just let all cops play Pokemon Go all shift. Seems like the lesser evil.