Still making my argument for me. 

I didn’t come up this way. I did the whole college/law school/grad school bit and ended up making the same money as the managers who only finished high school until I went back into law. $75k. 9-5 hours, 4 weeks vacation, excellent healthcare and profit-sharing, steady contributions to bank-run 401k, discounts on…

You literally just made my argument for me, thanks.

I don’t know where you live, but in NY (most of the state), there’s at least 1 local/regional bank/credit union on every street corner, and more likely 4, and they are thriving.

Yeah. No. You’re a hiring manager? Not everyone goes to college, so yes, a competent hiring manager is going to look at the kind of experience a high school graduate looking for a full time job has. Who do you think is getting hired? The waitress, the American eagle sales person, or the bank teller? Oh, that’s right!…

Ask any hiring manager or HR professional and they will tell you that they’ll hire a bank employee 10/10 times due to their customer service experience. Also, they pay better than both internships and entry level admin work across the board, while providing job training and benefits. In this economy with such an…

I mean, that’s assuming that the person is going to college. You can become a bank manager with no college degree and make decent money will gaining valuable on the job training in customer service, sales, mortgages, credit history/reporting, general banking, finance, and management with access to a quality retirement…

My best friend follows the royals this way. One of my co-workers went to Eton with Prince William and he is under threat of death not to ever tell her. We would never hear the end of it.

Eh, if she wants to earn some money, learn some important skills, start to build a resume AND sit in a temperate climate, have her start as a teller at a bank/credit union. Some of them will start kids as young as 16 and it looks far better on a resume if she’s looking at white collar careers. Also cuts down on the…

Eh, I don’t know anything about these people, but I am a sucker for good interior design and quality home furnishings. I was in mortgage banking for years and, if I had to guess, I would say they make enough money on paper to qualify for a mortgage on a house that expensive, but don’t actually have the cash to…

The Met Gala is just this side of passe now. Once you have Kardashians show up, the party is over. My firm has bought a table every year for the last 15 and it used to be a fun party. Now it’s just a commercial whorefest. My boss has attended for the last 10 years and she says it’s gone downhill ever since Anna…

So is the co-worker who fell on top of a bunch of Japanese businessmen on 3 separate outings.

And cocaine, too, I would imagine 

Ugh. They're such nasty pops of sickening sweetness in pasta dishes.

Ugh. Someone tell Linda to put on one of the eleventy billion Ann Taylor cardigans in her desk and shut the fuck up about the air conditioning. There’s only so much clothing I can shed before someone calls HR, she, however can wrap herself in any one of her hideous pinterest knitting projects, preferably tight enough…

Yeah. It's rape porn, at best with the added shitty bonus of using a "strong woman" as cover. 

I realized early in my legal career that hanging with the boys outside of work wasn’t going to make them like me any better, it was just going to give then cover with HR when they were questioned about why women weren’t included in their outings.

It’s also a major HR nightmare. The VC practice at my law firm has quit taking on startups that have on tap beer 24/7 and other bro trappings because every single one in their pipeline has shuttered in the last two years over “inappropriate conduct”-related lawsuits.

No problem. I read it 3 times to try and figure out how I kept missing the funny part before realizing that there isn't one.

No, just order something small and/or cheap