Between Mary Jo’s fastball and the Pennsylvania grand jury report, that’s going to be a lot of retired priests.  

Why do you hate our troupes?

His spatial reasoning skills are off the charts. I walked facefirst into a wall the other day in my own home.

“...were part of a group that confronted Devante’ “Tay Bang” Zachery...” 

“...in the double-shooting sleeve, late-stage Melo getup”

Eh, predictable. Just like his mom, he couldn’t resist the West.

Right? The Earth should have been a disc.

Klutch Sports Group, which sounds like a Macedonian gag news site

Cash me in Temecula.

I think it was Jesus who spake: “And lo, do teach unto thy children that money, it doth talk, while the bullshit, it doth walk.”

Much like his hairline, it’s not the lie. It’s the cover-up.

I guess I don’t really C what the B D is.

Are we getting 500 days of this? We’re getting 500 days of this, aren’t we.

Tennis Integrity Unit is the worst version of Law & Order yet.

Grandpa?

It’s almost like the entire idea of America is anathema to Kings.

Eli never cared for Papa John’s anyway. “Too spicy mama, too spicy” he would say when his wife would tell him to open the hanger for the airplane.

If he is 20, I would advise him to go straight to college. I would tell him, don’t go back to Rockville and waste another year.

An alternative headline: “J.R. Smith Has No Chili”.

Reminds me of when Kentucky’s coach had to grab the mic and tell the couple fucking in the bleachers “quit, cousins.”