My gf at the time dragged me to see this movie, and when it was over she couldn’t stop talking about how romantic it was. I couldn’t stop talking about she’s a hooker.

Considering the FBI looked into the fact that 45 might be a puppet of Russia, that 45 talks behind closed doors with Russian officials with no else present, tells his interpreter to destroy their notes; he needs to be removed from office asap.

“Smart chicks are so hot.” - Xander Harris

What is a ‘part’, as in mix equal parts of this and that.

Study: Green New Deal Will Park Its New Car (With The Price Still In The Window) Halfway Between A Handicapped Spot And A Regular Spot

My therapist just suggested this last week, now when I catch myself thinking/saying negatively I say out loud ‘creidim’  in an Irish accent. It’s the Irish word for ‘believe’.

I wonder if their excessive ages causes them forgot how the weather used to be in their youth and think nothing of the shorter winters/hotter summers. This is why elected officials should be required to retire at 65 like most jobs. 

Imagine playing a living legend, then getting to perform with them. I’m watching this video in a dusty office where someone is cutting onions.

I have a ‘I Want Jar’... for my 47 year old self. I’ve had this jar for years and put nickels and dimes into for blu-rays, LEGO, or anything else ‘I WANT’

He must use mirrors to watch Dotard Donny’s lips on his ass

It happened twice to my brother and that’s why I use cash as much as I can.

Hint taken.

And 5 and 6 are their ages.

Hoverboards, and Hoverbikes!

The Trump Library will the first to have an adult section in the back.

Cereal at night tastes better than it does in the morning.

Dotard Donny is a habitual liar, just add this one to the pile.