Sigh . . . I was going to be offended but you are totally right.

wut

Reassign all those unnecessary managers into real jobs and cut out the time that regular employees spend on unnecessary management bullshit and the HBR calculates that the United States of America could increase its gross domestic product by $3 trillion per year.

Last time I checked that’s only worth .002 goals on the black market.

Or maybe they are grown people who made a choice based on a sincere religious conviction. Who the fuck are you to judge?

Most reporters didn’t know she was Muslim because she didn’t look Muslim, i.e. she didn’t cover her hair, arms or legs. And that seems like actual, real progress.

“particular church” . . . is that, like, protestant or something?

Sorry to be that guy but . . . you know you got drunk “last night” but you don’t know whether the whole football season has passed since that time?

First, he dragged Real Madrid to Champions League glory (pulling them through the least daunting field maybe ever, but hey, winning’s winning) in May.

“Mr. Pierre-Paul, I am now showing you what has been marked as Platintiff’s Exhibit 1. Can you please flip to page 102 . . . er, sorry, you seem to be having trouble there. I mean can you turn a few more pages past that point . . . just there . . . ok, you know what, just put one of these on your stub.”

<obvious penis joke>

Coincidentally, “nine man Roma” is currently also the most watched video on redtube.

No evidence to suggest Carl Lewis was doping? Really?? So I guess use of HGH would not be “doping” under your definition?

Humble, jellyfish

Overpriced food item? PISTACHIOS. Why the hell are they so expensive? It’s like ten dollars for a little bag of those (which I can eat in one sitting)

She told me you have microballs, chip.

Are you stoned?

I don’t think the make up of the court is good for Brady right now.

Currently, the hypothetical team (let’s call them the Smets) is actually 5 games under .500. If the Smets are 10-20 and the first place team is 15-15, then the Smets are 5 games back of the first place team. (i.e., 10 half-games or 10 wins) I can have this opinion but also simultaneously believe that the Smets are ten …

Apocryphal Suplex is the new name of all my fantasy teams.