Some paper hurts, some paper produces dingleberries.. yes brand matters! Charmin Ultra Strong for the nonhurty no dingleberry win!

Bless you for picking up your poop. I live on a route to a park. SO MANY people just let it lay! I pick up dog shit every day of my life and I do. not. have. a dog. Just typing about it makes me feel a little stabby and I’m a peaceful person! Perhaps I should sit out there and suggest brightest flashlight to all…

If she wants to impress me with her Rio anthem I’m going to need some lyrics about the glory of swimming in actual shit.

80.. EIGHTY! I had a long hard day at the office (except that the office is a restaurant and my desk job is actually a server job) and I heard someone mention an accident with a truck at Bastille Day but it never occurred to me that it would be an attack. It’s too late to call my real time friends, so I’m super…

I’m heartsick at ALL of it. We need to have some serious introspection in this country.

John Oliver for President. I mean.. if we can have a Kenyan... ;)

LOL... that is all. ;)

Love the username. Lenny and Squiggy, represent. ;)

I came here to mention the ‘cognitive dissidents’ as well.. and also point out that not only is this woman batshit crazy, she’s just positively loathsome. So of COURSE Faux News gives her a platform for her hateful nonsense. It’s their thing.

Pretty sure I could not sleep with that creature in my house. Also, changing a dogs diapers? All nope.

Hah.. it’s a great tune, brought to me in my youth compliments of my super cool late Gran.

This is horrifying. All of the xenophobia and ignorance and hate.. is it me or is it just getting worse and worse?

Right? Jesus h christ on a crotchrocket. There is a very huge, very real reason why rape is so horrifically underreported.

My reaction was a combination of those two! ;)

This made me LOL.. also the part about not telling on your imaginary naked friend. You won my internet today.

Is that really truly a thing? I thought it was exaggerated for comedic license! I have a friend in BC and she’s super into natural everything (also: no gluten.. fun!) but I can’t imagine her saying something like that to a stranger.. and a sleep deprived hormonal one at that!

Guh-ross. They only thing I have that’s more disgusting is my middle school art teacher, who was an unusually hirsute man and had dandruff in his very black eyebrows. If you’re thinking “that’s not so disgusting” buckle up, because the man ALSO PICKED HIS EARWAX AND ATE IT.

When even Kim Kardashian thinks you’re being an asshole you might want to rethink your life choices.

I accidentally sort of love James Blunt now. I’d never thought about it before, but if he’s going to be that spot on hilarious then I give it a 5/5. Would sit.

God she’s horrible. (yes, I’ve seen the show. More than once. Yes, I know I’ve brought shame on my entire family and generations to come). I don’t usually judge people’s parenting choices, but paying money to THIS awful facsimile of a human being to have her emotionally abuse your kid.. just.. no.