This otter pup is going to be single-handedly responsible for breaking the Internet with cute.

Somehow, this could be related to our propensity to think of many abstract concepts as zero-sum games. Like, "I paid into my morality bank earlier, so now I can make a withdrawal." We see a lot of life as zero-sum, even when many aspects most definitely are not, keeping us in states of perpetual competition, even when…

That's Mr. Loaf to you

I get so frustrated (enraged?) and embarrassed by our state. I got involved in politics on the local level, and I can tell you, it's not much better. Ugh

THIS is why I refuse to call this nonsense anything other than the CT Boobernatorial Race. I really hate my home state sometimes. (Most times, really. I'm grasping to find one thing I don't loathe about it and right now, all I've got is the Mark Twain House.)

Is your use of "shitlords" also referential to the delivery of said babies or...?

Pretty sure it's the aspect of the fiction that really disturbs me. I suppose it's also why I get the icks from fanfic in general. These are actual, real, living humans people write these tales about. I find it very creepy from that perspective alone.

precisely. In fact, the law of averages might imply paranormal activity is more likely to occur in densely populated areas, but at least there's someone there to hear you scream.

That story is pretty much the reason I no longer dream of moving to the country

It is daylight, I have very light on in the house, and I feel like I'm still going to suffer for having read that story.

I am actually in a real cold sweat. I scare so easily, and that one THAT ONE. Oh my god.

Pinochle is just one of the best words. Truth.

to that, he should know I feel oddly satisfied that that bust makes him look like J Edgar Hoover.

I want to enact my performance art installation where I eat cake while listening to Cake, doing it in wedding dresses would make it 10000000 times better. Join me at MoMA. We will rock the art world.

it really is, isn't it? Also lovely in pumpkin beer

You forgot Ebola and politics, which I understand are non foodstuffs but still.

Yes, and my follow up thought was to rationalize it "well he does seem to be a bit of a tool..."

Lucille Bluth, take it away:

wheee!

It's happening. This time, it's real. All the rumors, all the conjecture, it's coming to fruition: sheer unadulterated media panic.