Jessica Simpson is supposed to finally get married this weekend. She and Eric Johnson will tie the knot in Santa Barbara, and she probably won't wear white

Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty.

I've watched this three times now and it's still perfect. I created this opinion whilst adopting a sweat infusion at a draconian juicery in the Outer Banks.

The only thing I look forward to from the impending rise in sea levels is the disappearance of Florida. Here's hoping the residents like that one are too stupid to leave.

I avoid Bareilles like the plague, so that's a mystery to me. I'll definitely take your word for it though!

Hm, does sound like whoever wrote this for Perry did rip them off, but I'm not sure the "black magic" tack is really the best choice when good ol' plagiarism would probably do just fine.

I followed the link so that I could see what this description meant:

He's 100x better at Kermit the Frog than Henson's son. THERE I SAID IT.

My procrastination regarding my health has for once put me at the forefront of developments in healthcare. Yay?

Only thing I could think of...

For a span of about a year, Mr. Farce and I seemed to be Lost Dog Homing Beacons, we ended up with four different escapees (one of whom we adopted ourselves because her owner was an abusive and neglectful shit) on our hands at various points. It's almost uncanny how quickly people will offer to take a lost dog off…

Third, there's a thing sandwiches need called "sauce" or "some type of condiment."

Is Vegas running numbers on her actually performing at each scheduled show? What's the over/under on that?

I have no idea why my comment elicited this response.

curmudgeons 4lyfe!

you'd be surprised, particularly given that fantastic Catholic thing where you confess to ANY sin and you can be absolved.

Lana Del Rey: word-salad enthusiast/masochistic chanteuse

because I have a very visceral reaction to the idea that someone actually named their band "Lady Antebellum,"