In Russia, the business gets balls deep in you.

Repentance. If you repent after butt-fucking 19 innocent young children against their will, you are welcomed into heaven by the Man himself, get a prime penthouse with a nice view and an eternity of peeled grapes fed directly to your mouth.

Not Tiffany. That’s why they don’t talk about her. They’ve shunned the un-Jezebel.

Easy, Emeril. :)

It tastes NY subway rail: piss, rats, rat piss and all

“Refreshing” as in ‘all I could feel was the cold floor tiles against my knees and the cold porcelain of the toilet bowl against my arms as I hugged it and held on for dear life’, I bet.

My Volkswagen has a pretty clear warning system. It has even reminded me of my annual factory service—“SERVICE DUE” it nagged at me from the display (and I got a call from my dealership as well, but that’s because in the ‘10,000 km or one year’ service schedule I got it for the ‘one year’—still have a few km to go…

Waitaminute… “…wearing nothing but a green jacket”?!

Just a bottom.

Sexually, he’s not a feeder.

If you’re a renter in NY, the gaping asshole is, unfortunately, yours, after being monthly assraped by those disgusting pricks for god knows how long.

Just like in email or mail scams there are always glaring grammar errors (according to Dr. Phil — not a real doctor) to filter out smart and educated people (only the rubes and ignoramuses who read and find nothing ‘wrong’ get in touch with the scammers, clever people simply don’t), Trump et caterva (that’s Latin for…

Two words: Chap, stick.

You don’t need to add visible tape. Texture is enough. Apply the loop side of a black velcro strip to the back bottom of the remote. Thus you can feel which side is towards the screen (if you feel the fabric against your folded pinky, it’s the right way, if you feel it anywhere else, it’s the wrong way), in the…

The poor dear didn’t even get to enjoy the greatest bliss of being a woman, widowhood.

Sure, you’re right. I was assuming. Sorry for that. Bye now.

Paul, Paul, Paulie… I am not assuming anything. I am stating that chicken breast is naturally not very flavorful, and that it tends to dry up when cooked. Those two facts, widely known by pretty much everyone, lead many people to try to combat both effects by slathering sauces/dressings on their chicken breast, even…

*IF* you marinade and *IF* you cook the chicken breast right. Usually people don’t, so on goes the barbecue sauce.

Those tax returns will NEVER see the light of day. If it gets widely known that Trump is so poor that he needed to run this scam of being president to funnel $$ to his businesses, he will never fuck anyone ever again. Because “being a billionaire” is his only seduction move.

I’d fuck Ivanka justo to spite him.