Cocaine doesn’t make you WANT to fuck uggoes. It makes you NEED to fuck them, IF they give you cocaine, or money to buy cocaine, or things you can sell to get money to buy cocaine.

There is no “Trump love child” because Trump has never been capable of love for anyone other than himself, and that doesn’t lead to children (I know that for a fact).

Heck, Obama could have just run while being “a dirty n*gger” and they would have been foaming at the mouth… Oh, wait… They did.

“…Some restaurants hear ‘medium-rare’ and go straight to ‘blue-rare.’”

People put barbecue sauce or Italian dressing on chicken breast because it tends to dry up, and even when it doesn’t, it has very little flavor.

Why would midgets need someone to look after some cake while they go out to dinner and a movie? 

People daydream when the roads are good and predictable. Wide turning radii, long straight stretches of good pavement, that sort of thing. That’s basically the ‘safest’ roads. It kinda sucks, but alas, maybe that’s the nature of life: find a way to kill us even when we protect ourselves.

I’m sorry, but banging one the side won’t get you pregnant. It has to be dead center.

She most definitely shouldn’t.

Two things:

The mini fridge turns off when you leave the room?! That’s preposterous! In the many hotels where I stayed that had this system, the mini fridge was always on a dedicated circuit, and it was kept running regardless.

Some hotels do require a valid room key. Not necessarily the key to the same room you’re staying in, because the code changes all the time, but a key from the same hotel.

It is panic mode now. They KNOW they have no leg to stand on, that the tide is turning in red district after red district. The GOP will likely anoint Pence at the drop of a hat (notice how he’s been laying low and there are no aspersions on him recently? I think that’s Mueller’s plan to smooth things over: wave the…

No. No dissection. Better taxidermy Trump and put him on a pedestal in the Congress Rotunda, to make it a warning to future would-be traitors

That’s precisely what I came down here to post.

ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!

Ooooh! Dice! Now with the halo, F1 cars have a place to hang fuzzy dice from!

He’s pretty skookum’.

The only plausible reason for all the hatred toward 44 is that Melania fell face first on a BBC and enjoyed it. Now she don’t want no teeny-weeny, shriveled-middle, orangey, old-man dick.

Be serious. Trump was hoping that dimwit of a son-in-law would do all his homework, actually running the fucking country while leaving ms. hot-piece-of-ass in the WH close to daddy. If he fires golden boy and ends up having to let Lolita II—the Incestful Bride go too, it’ll be because he has to save face, and if needs…