It’s simple, implement the system that the NHL keeps talking about (and hopefully enacts as soon as humanly possible): once your team is eliminated from playoff contention, there’s a point system based on how many games you win after you’ve been taken out.

I realize this post was in jest (and pretty funny too, I liked the dog butt) but just wanted to say that anyone who’s concerned about a dog being purebred is not a real dog fan, and dog shows (up to, including, and especially the Westminster) are a fucking joke. Just have a dog and treat it nice.

I don’t even really like Coldplay outside of the first record but the only thing Imagine Dragons have in common with them is they were both mentioned in these 2 posts. Holy CHRIST those guys are terrible. I think they might be in an all time tie with 21 Pilots in terms of bands that just have no redeeming value other…

My grandmother had a green Shadow when I was a kid, which is pretty much all you need to know about Shadows. Though her previous whip was an Omni, which makes this car look like a goddamn Porsche.

That’s goddamn amazing, you get a STAR

Really great article, enjoyed that.

Oh yeah I wasn’t really being serious, although you mention totally circular tracks do exist? That’s sort of neat. But as you say, that’d sort of mess with you after a while I’m sure. If there was a really big wide one that’d be fun as hell on rollerblades though.

Not nearly enough stars. Between this and the 20 kilos of cocaine/heroin post today, there’s been some top notch comments. Well done everyone.

If you’re a male skater in the Olympics and don’t even attempt a quad, you are not winning, no matter how great a skater you might be. Not saying you need to land 15 of them in a routine, and obviously it’s insanely difficult, but such is the nature of this already ridiculous, ridiculous activity already, and he knew…

Get really emotional everyone, about a “sport” that is decided completely by judges, and who have been regularly exposed as being corrupt. Let’s get realistic folks, while it’s neat to look at, it is not possibly worth the thousands of hours that skaters have to go through to get there, only to be famous for six…

Ahh, did not know that. Makes sense. They should totally make a circular track that’s angled a little bit, like a runner’s version of a bicycle velodrome, so you’re sort of always turning, that’d be super neat.

Serious question: are indoor tracks made of a different material or something? I can’t imagine the wind alone on an outdoor track could affect someone’s time by that big a margin (could it? I assume most tracks inside stadiums -even outdoor ones- wouldn’t have a super intense amount of wind most of the time). Also…

I think we’re all missing the point here folks. The point is there’s a guy named Mike Cantaloupe who’s the Cocoa Chief of Police. I assume this is his other gig:

Not sure if you think you’re being clever, or playing dumb about being clever, or actually just dumb, but in any of those cases, you are the worst/best/worst again commenter in the history of Kinja.

I second that emotion...I’m Canadian but work mostly in the US, and the for the last 4-5 Olympics I’ve had to suffer through NBC’s coverage, which tends to be 45 mins of actual sports, followed by 4 hours of horrible bullshit, and VERY heavy on “let’s only look at what Americans are doing.” I realize yes, the USA…

In other news, nothing happened today and no one gives a fuck. Seriously this is “news?” The country is on fire, being run by a child, and a picture that essentially no one saw and that no one is offended by is getting put in front of us? Jesus fucking christ, of all the things we could be legitimately offended by and…

Serious question, and I mean no offence to anyone for any reason...but is there a way to customize one’s Deadspin feed to only feature the things one is interested in (or at least, filter out the things one is definitely not interested in)? I put this here because I don’t happen to be wicked into “football” or…

You get a star simply for your name. Plus replicators would be absolutely ace. “Chicago style pizza. (Takes a bite, changes mind) New York style pizza.”

Or at the very least, if you have stackable washer/dryer as many do, put a damn hole in the bottom of the washer, and it just drops the clothes in the dryer when it’s done, which then turns on. Pick your dryer settings when you put the wash in, and bingo-bango.

Heh, I could have sworn you used the words “talented” and “parkour” in the same sentence, without the words “couldn’t possibly” or “obviously not.” Running around and jumping over stuff is not a sport, it’s barely an activity. Doing it in and around something dangerous is simply being a bonehead. Just because someone…