“For a Muslim no government can make laws, only laws have been set forth in Koran.”

Well, I know what I’m expecting on next week’s Wait Wait. I even read this with Bill Kurtis’s voice.

A woman named Angela Kipp

Little Miss Angela
Sat in her Hyundai Sonata
Eating her curds & whey
Along came a spider
Who sat down beside her
And revealed her nine-year-old as the actual adult in the room

Plus spiders! Gah!

Encrotchment - 5 yard penalty. Declined.

Just another way, all the incredible nurses out there are saving our lives.

because the muslin is trying to destoy hour contry.

Actually, Egregious Lying is leading the polls.

there was a winner?

At this point, even Trump has to be saying to himself, “How the hell am I still winning this thing?” He could be the first accidental presidential nominee.

So he can give it to your girlfriend after banging her as a kind of forget-me-not.

A million stars for The Smiths lyrics!

Fox News reports that police are considering a “love triangle”

I would - happily! You’re preaching to the choir.

“Well, this is thoroughly depressing.”

This headline is tasteless joke entrapment.