I have never written anything positive about Bernie Sanders. I called him incoherent and “your stoner roommate’s idea of a lefty saint” in my recap of the Democratic debate. If you have the idea that I’ve gone easy on him, you got it from your imagination.

Only marginally better than the time Anakin Skywalker opened a Montessori school.

Disney let a dying fan see an unedited version of The Force Awakens. I’m sure he and his family signed a mountain of paperwork saying they would talk about the movie with anyone, but what’s really stopping that fan from spoiling the plot? What if he was disappointed—would a lawsuit really stop him from telling…

The Panthers are 7-1 and are going to the championship what are you even talking about

Sure it’s not a victory over racism, but it’s literally impossible to do any one thing that has that result. Making sure the people in charge care and make it a priority to have a non-racist campus is an important prerequisite to getting practical measures in place.

SHOCKINGLY, amenities at hotels are inspected for safety- pools, gyms, saunas, ect. Most likely, had this been a hotel, safety standards would’ve meant that the swing wouldn’t have existed in the first place. I know, I know, logic is hard sometimes for the “any regulation is the death of everything because…

Horrible coworkers clearly bullying a person with food allergies by eating all their birthday ice cream. Come on.

Lacob’s Splatter

Cover design by Tom Brady’s courtroom sketch artist.

(Shit, that’s a good point. We can fail statistics together.

There’s another factor related to that—a lot of players have complained that the crackdown on high tackling (because brain trauma is bad PR) have led to more knee and ankle injuries. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but a torn ACL is more noticeable and keeps a player out longer than a concussion does.

(You’re missing an important variable: the NFL has significantly cracked down on how tackles are made, as well as late hits that are more dangerous because they’re unexpected, over the last decade plus.

I really hate it when bad things happen to good people. What did I do to deserve this happen to my fantasy team?

The war on drugs. What a waste. Keep racing Randy, I’ll sure as hell burn one for you.

only about 400 fans showed up

If you weren’t so angry about all the unprovoked, unnecessary, unrepentant killings and abuse, then I wouldn’t be so irrationally afraid. It’s all your fault for not being ok with everything.