All due respect to your “1st clip is better” stance, but that 2nd clip is bananas.

He may have won this round. But I think we need the cloud of dust* to settle before deciding if it was the right move for San Francisco to take Alex Smith over Aaron Rodgers.

They make me wish I was a Packers fan.

Jon Gruden: See, this guy right here. He’s a guy I like to call “Brokey McFuckstick”, because I make around 40% more annually than-

Everyone at Deadspin gets together at the beginning of the year to decide the official feelings for every team. It’s exhausting, but how else are you gonna make sure to piss everyone off?

The Reuben one reminded me of a story Terry Pratchett told. He said that one jet-lagged evening he accidently asked for Three Mile Island dressing for his salad. The waitress didn’t say a word, just brought him Thousand Island dressing and a bottle of hot sauce.

“You’re not ‘old’ enough to get that call Cam. I’d give that call to an ‘old’ quarterback like Peyton Manning or Tom Brady or Andrew Luck or Ryan Tannehill or Nick Foles or Johnny Manziel, or Flacco, or Julian Edelman if they call his number for a passing play, but never to a ‘young’ guy like you or Michael Vick or…

Never Forget. Lithuania finished in a surprising 3rd. Laying the foundation for future megastar Parsnip Bazinga.

Photoshopped this yesterday, in a response to Erin’s tweet about One Millions Moms going all apeshit over goddamn rainbow-colored snacks.

West: (stares)

The first sign the company was in a tailspin should have been that the "Senior Communications Manager" was using Comic Sans as her e-mail font.

It’s a false equivalency that really only exists because of your cartoonish interpretation of what left-wing people are saying. It’s incredibly easy to find right-wingers who will decry any poor person taking a government “handout” as being a mooch but find me one prominent left-wing politician who advocates for…

I mean, I’m pretty sure my high school boyfriend has washed his sheets since then but I can go back and try and find it if you really want it!

This dude looks like Jim Carrey and John Gruden had a retarded baby

But if you do the math, they may literally have a ton of fans there.

One dude stops waving before the bus is even fully passed. One dude couldn’t be bothered to put on a red shirt. One dude DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP OUT OF HIS CHAIR.

usually I am not one to criticise, but I cannot believe they didn’t realise their mistake. they really need to find out who authorised this, because I cannot find any way to rationalise such an error.

You know, one day I’ll be mature enough not to giggle for thirty seconds about the couple fighting over their Dog’s sperm being named the Wangsnesses.

I’m waiting for the pecan pie M&Ms with bated breath and mild horror but as a general rule of thumb Hersheys chocolate should be buried at a crossroads with a stake through its heart*