Tomsula (into a tin can on a string): HELLO? HELLO? *angrily bangs can repeatedly on cardboard wall of his cardboard box home, holds can back up to his ear* HELLO?!!

Cowabuga, dude!

Spending all my time in the grays, I’m pretty sure I know what I’m talking about, as a matter of fact!

Everybody loves throwing around a bunch of “theories” on this arguably very gray matter.

Vin Diesel approves!

Fair enough. We here at Deadspin just love bustin’ balls.

The only thing worse are those fans that use “we” while discussing their favorite sports club.

I heard George C. Scott is booked for the remake of this video.

Maybe there’s self-cannibalization.

Yeah, I mean, WTF Deadspin?? STICK TO SPORTS, like football, basketball and golf!

Pictured: Brady retrieving the original ball as more and more are introduced:

Also, Patrick died on his way back to his home planet.

I heard they threw in a couple of free blankets for the family too.

Scare-a-mucci also sounds like a prank the Irish kids played on the Italian kids back in the 50s.

Whatever it is, I’ll buy one if it can PEEL AND REPLACE a big misshaped orange.

Don’t blame me. I voted for Kodos.

Edit: my insightful and witty comment was already made by someone else.

I am evil Stephen... I am evil Stephen...

“SEE! As I was saying... These reporters are merely flees on Houston Nutt’s sack.”