I heard George C. Scott is booked for the remake of this video.

Maybe there’s self-cannibalization.

Yeah, I mean, WTF Deadspin?? STICK TO SPORTS, like football, basketball and golf!

Pictured: Brady retrieving the original ball as more and more are introduced:

Also, Patrick died on his way back to his home planet.

I heard they threw in a couple of free blankets for the family too.

Scare-a-mucci also sounds like a prank the Irish kids played on the Italian kids back in the 50s.

Whatever it is, I’ll buy one if it can PEEL AND REPLACE a big misshaped orange.

Edit: my insightful and witty comment was already made by someone else.

I am evil Stephen... I am evil Stephen...

“SEE! As I was saying... These reporters are merely flees on Houston Nutt’s sack.”

Who says society has to be a man or a woman? Maybe society IS the nutsack, in and of itself. We collectively live within this giant disembodied cosmic nutsack... which apparently has fleas.

If you really want to geek out on the Westworld theme, check out this fantastic interpretation (if you haven’t already):

How awesome is that Westworld theme song! Same composer as GoT.

Every photo of Donald Trump Jr looks like the photog caught him at mid-dry-heave.

“...when the fan decided not to continue paying for his season tickets to see his trainwreck of a favorite team.”

AKA the Ghost of Deadspin past.

Bakelants added, “Welp, I guess I’ll have to settle for this plush lion and a stitch-remover. Time to make some load movies, little buddy.”

Now THAT’S a fonzanoon!

If you really want to blow your mind, please read about Scientology. According to its followers (including Battlefield Earth stars Travolta and Pepper) this movie is NON-FICTION. Hell, the headquarters for Scientology is called “Gold Base.”