We get it dude, you're a libertarian 

Can you guys please stop helping Amy Schumer make the news? We are getting so close to her fading away. Please...please stop.

There was Ivanka, a charming huntress

This site sucks.

Whale oil can't melt iron beams!

Actually lost my shit at that suggest. Ahahahahaha. Take your fucking star, sir.

And with that, the country closes its door on the largest and most increasingly-depressing sandwich chain.

That really puts the “crust” in crustacean.  

Someone who is really good at finding water with a Y-shaped stick. Source: The Beverley Hillbillies.

How totally random, right?

Please attempt to “randomly rest” your hand in the same way Zina Bash did during the hearing and let us know if it feels natural.

Obviously it hasn’t hit him hard enough because he is still a raging asshole.

Actually, as a tot, I thought they were more or less orthopaedic shoes for seniors, to be worn with the nylon tracksuits so popular with my nan’s social circle.

lol @ anyone who believes this was an accident.

That’s such a stupid response, I’m not even going to bother to address it.

HuffPost’s is pretty good:  “Trump loses Pecker.”

“Expropriations.”

Or in this case, all three rolled into a single person.

Because he didn’t think the things he tweeted were problematic until there was backlash.

Cats have only lived with humans for 5,000 years, ever since North African wildcats started hanging around as ratters.