I actually work as an academic, which is why I know discussing something with caveats and lack of bias is okay.

Oh honey. I have nothing but contempt and pity for you at this point. If you can’t tell the difference between careful dissemination, with credit to bias, and made-up stories, you have much larger problems than I can do anything about.

No, honey, it’s like trying to tell someone how people discuss critical issues, and watching them be stupid. You are stupid. You know you were wrong, but you can’t admit it. I think of you as “that dumb asshole who can’t think critically.”

Oh, and this is happening. Will you call it a “conspiracy theory” because you don’t like it? Probably as you don’t remotely get critical discourse.

We buy up lots of very realistic VR headsets and strap them on conservatives. Give them their conservative hell complete with concentration camps; let them live the whole thing out from beginning to its inevitable conclusion with them in international trials for crimes against humanity. Then, maybe we just let that…

I’m fucking with you. I’m just done. I can’t even believe how fucking stupid, racist, sexist, and just generally stupid a great deal of our population is.

Not really as I didn’t pass around any conspiracy theories.

Oops. Guess he thought he had me there! haha!

haha! It’s too late. You got it, finally (!) and then, couldn’t admit wrong.

Oh my god. So, you realized you were wrong, but couldn’t admit it. LOL! It’s no wonder we’re in the mess we’re in.

You are making this stuff up. Very few people go to college for free, and those study abroad things come out of pocket, period. I know! Brown people! So terrible!

::head desk::

The tampered boxes first came from Jill Stein’s website, with photos. As you do, my fellow friends and I noticed this but waited for full confirmation. Even with photos you have to be careful. Then, more than one news source picked up the story.

No. It’s really not. You’ve dug yourself in a hole here with these claims, and you’re not right. There is a vast difference between saying, “I heard they are hoarding ballots” and saying “There’s a news story reporting ballot hoarding, but I can’t get confirmation.”

You actually don’t understand this, do you?

You are reasonably stupid, aren’t you?

I would have liked to hear more of that last part.

Pineapple and pepperoni are fantastic together, and you will not take that away from me!!!

You’ll have to pry my pizza from my cold, dead hand.

No. I will not entertain the possibility that pizzagate is real. It’s embarrassingly ridiculous.