Lately I’ve been gassy in the evenings. Like clockwork. What’s that say about my digestion?

Anybody else been gassy? I was so gassy at work yesterday that when some guy was being a colossal douche I would pass by him and quietly cropdust him. Seriously I did it at least four times over the course of a day.

Obama didn’t have the House and Senate behind him nor a vacant seat on the Supreme Court which is what drove Trump supporters to the polls. Rage and fear is not only expected but the only normal reactions to this result.

I hope they never feel another moment’s peace the rest of their days. Their inhumanity is simply staggering.

I hate the entire Republican Party.

Dear Paul Ryan

Is there an app or an add on that will block pictures of him and his family? Like what some people do with the kardashians?

Me either. This proved last night that America is a majority racist, sexist, religiously bigoted country that I am not proud of. I wish Obama, would just say fuck it and say i’m not calling him, I have no intention of helping him, and I think he’s a fuckin jackass.

This idea that our fellow citizens are innately good people.

Voting for a candidate that espouses those things is an endorsement of them. A person can feel all the entitlement they want to a good job they once had, and believe that Trump is somehow going to move an iPhone factory to Wisconsin so you can keep stamping metals or whatever, but if you place those motives above…

But oh man, having the time and money to spend three hours at the gym everyday with a personal trainer?

Read the comments at the Washington Post. It’s the expected amount of whining.

I did not write “by the same ‘member of a group (as a minority) that is included within a larger group through tokenism’”

No. You don’t get away with the bad proofreading argument for a ten word post—even if we humour you and ignore that you’re obviously lying.

Did it take anyone else a minute to get the Taylor Swift costume joke? I kept staring at it like, “Okay, I see Beyoncé and Rihanna and the baby is Prince but where is Taylor?”

I have a feeling no matter who writes this, there will be a preponderance of scenes of her smoking glamorously, crying, screaming, running and throwing things.

You know he’d lose and blame it on a rigged referee and bad gloves made in GYNA.

She is awful but I did take some pleasure in seeing her finances fall apart towards the end of the season.

They’re fancy too!

Man, I really want an update on that “Relentlessly Gay” lady who raised $43,000 to make her yard “more gay” by adding an apiary for bees to just relax and a bat sanctuary and other such gay things. Her GoFundMe page has disappeared and I can’t seem to find out what is happening/what happened to the money.