I like to sing "who let the dogs out".

I feel like there's gotta be some weird butt-to-vag cross contamination happening in these things.

i'm slowclapping the fuck out of that beautiful statement. Thank you. I know it is not your first career choice but you seem like the most wonderful sales person in a bridal salon selling bridal gowns to brides ever. Thank you.

"jeans panties" made me laugh so hard I snorted.

this song just inspired me to go yell at the hooligans being loud jerks outside my apartment.

my dog knows a couple of commands in several languages and is also capable of deciphering the weird collection of sounds I make when I want doggie cuddles "wurrrrgey guuuurg dirg... wuuuuurt haaaaw"

I have couple police officer friends who will always go to "indecency" calls for breastfeeding and will immediately go to the mother (not the caller) and ask if she's feeling harassed.

yeah a good portion of the boob is covered by the baby's head. I've seen more visible boobage hanging out of v necks in offices.

not all of us down in the grey-caste are bad... I have been and will be relegated to the greys forever for reasons unknown to me (some serious shitty karma from a past life as a troll?!?). I generally don't think I've been a jerk and I get recommended sometimes... oh well me and the other mutants at table 9 will be…

I've encountered a few dudes who have called me "a mistress, not a wife" and I'm still confused by it but find it incredibly insulting and hurtful. It's been explained to me as "there are just some kinds of girls that it's fun to fuck but you'd never marry" (I've never been given a mistress/wife grading rubric though…

I thought the same thing

are we long lost twins because I am secretly rooting for her for this reason too?

yes. Yes it would. I have babysat many children who have a particular fascination with boob torture. It is certainly not outside the realm of known child activities, I wouldn't associate it with domestic violence, just kids being assholes.

I was an extremely picky eater as a kid but my mom was okay always with it as long as it as I ate something with a "bright color that came from nature" (this is actually how she worded it) along with it. Now I'll try and probably like almost everything.

I honestly find the quality of old navy stuff faaaaar better than lululemon. I've had a couple of pairs of lulu pants and they always slip down my body as I run.

I am not sure how to communicate my love for what you have posted here so i will present you with my favorite gif ever

also

I swear to god my voice sounds like barry white with laryngitis in my own head but I almost always get asked if my parents are home when I answer the phone and it drives me bonkers. I wish I had a sexy chesty woman voice and could say sexy things with out sounding like creepysmurf.

uncomfortable photograph subjects unite!

I wore a lot of oversize destination tee-shirts from places I'd never been. I also had a serious eyebrow plucking problem and went through about 2 bottles of hair gel a week. I now shop at non-airport based clothing retailers. It gets better.