That was dam close. 

Marvin Tikvah approves.

First reaction...”That’s a 1996?!?!!” Can’t say I’m up to date on my mid-90s Jags but I thought they had moved past that design in the late 80s....

When you see me rolling up in this, you know what’s about to happen. I’m about to open the door, and saunter out in my baggy track suit wearing house shoes. I’m here to watch the local co-eds play some volleyball while I eat a concession stand corn dog.

You don’t need AWD, you only need winter tires.

Let’s be real; a 2015 Chrysler 200 might not be people around here’s dream car but tut should be serviceable transportation. I say find a mechanic you can trust and get your current car sorted. $23k for a kid headed off to college seems silly; even if due to the recent used car market $23k isn’t getting you what you…

I am. But I figured, if they’re recommending a Land Rover as a ‘reliable’ option, why not just take it to the next level of bad recommendations?

I know right?? Used RAV4 or CRV was my thought. Done and done. The kid got a freaking Chrysler 200 for chrissakes. He’s not looking for idiosyncratic, he’s looking for Point A-B. 

A 10 year old diesel Audi is never the answer to a reliability question.

I lived in Maine for 45 years. Went to college in Maine in both the western mountains and WAY Down East near the Canadian border. He doesn’t need AWD. Maine has these magical things called “snow plows” that remove the snow from the road and spread salt and sand on them. Lots and lots and lots of them.

A good suggestion for this guy wouldn’t need a warranty for peace of mind. I never understood the idea of leaning on the warranty as a justification for buying trash. I know I value my time more than wasting it in going back and forth to a dealer, but maybe other people just really like free Keurig coffee. I could…

“ I’m 19 and want to spend $23K on a car to take me to college”. This is, like, my 2nd least favorite category of WCSIB? right after “I’m 59 and I want to spend $80K on something fast!”

He mentioned the first time around was expensive, so I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt, but yeah, doesn’t necessarily mean impending doom. I know people that drive around with their check engine light on for eternity. As long as the car runs, they don’t care.

Owen, you’re a young man headed to college, so you’re going to need something that properly fits the college. If you were going to the University of Georgia, I’d tell you to get a used F-150 for tailgating and sheer redneck fun. If you were headed to UCLA, I’d recommend something with two wheels, so you can split…

Right? I thought I was reading satire for a second there. I’m beginning to question the automotive knowledge of Jalopnik writers.

The check engine light came on? That could be anything. It doesn’t mean it’s necessarily unreliable. Leaving the gas cap open can make that light come on. He should at least plug in an ODB2 reader and find out what it is before giving up on the car he owns.

Here you go, courtesy of Duncan Imports...

Guy: I want reliability.

“The Chrysler 200 I Bought A Few Months Ago Already Needs To Be Replaced!”

how are you going to train them to migrate, if they don’t have a parent to follow?