The percentage of legally intoxicated fans is only 8% on account of how expensive it is to get (or remain) drunk during the game.

•You think you embarrassed yourself in fantasy football (no, really, this was going to be the year Laurence Maroney finally put it together)? One Omahan finished last, and as part of his league's rules, had to get a little pink unicorn tattoo. Seems fair.

He kind of looks like Ted Williams.

Lies make baby Jesus cry.

God blessed me with some big hands

Now if I know my Lamarckism, all of Sanders's children will have the same deformity...

Other incidents involving race and sex have not been so funny to the black Cardinals.

A 46-year-old man, who rooted the New York Jets to victory, took a celebratory sled ride down his driveway in Great Kills...

Nice show working the Siege of Pensacola into DUAN Tommy.

I'm plagiarizing myself here

Auburn Fans Take to Walmart To Celebrate _______

Can I nominate Adam Rittenberg for "Shitty Sportswriting of 2011?"

The burglary at the architecture firm - Einhorn, Yaffee and Prescott - at 412 Broadway occurred October 31. There, a window was broken and two laptop computers, a penis and an NFL quarterback were stolen.

@DonChandlerMissed: You're missing my point I guess. I don't dispute your analysis of the official's fuck-up. But no whistle means the play's not dead. Had Oregon remembered that, they would have followed up and finished of the tackle in an manner most indisputable. Then this argument would be moot.

@DonChandlerMissed: It only got to a review because of a mental lapse on the the part of the defense. This wasn't the result of some fluky catch that was damn near impossible to defend. It was 11 guys playing stupid.

Whistle wasn't blown. Oregon gave up on the play regardless. End of story.

The Candien?

@norbizness: I'm suppressing laughter as I type this.

Andy Reid's overtime calculator.

John Olerud: 4 votes