Checkmate, Theists!

Thank you for pointing out the obvious.

Racist!

Also comes with free animated background!

Is there a video?

Best way to deal with muggers EVER.

Rimshot?

Great, now you tell me.

Just don't turn off thirst, please.

"Scientists have figured out how to turn off hunger"

So, just bore a hole in my head then shine lasers at my brain? Great, sign me up!

Um... it's a kind of hat... that attaches directly to the brain...

I figured out a way to turn off hunger ages ago. In fact, I just got back from session in which I turned off my hunger for at least a few hours. I call it "lunch".

Cue the "I don't have an eating disorder, therefore they must not exist" comments.

Mental disorders are just as hard to get over as physical ones, and that fact that awful people like you say things like that makes them even harder. You poisonous words are part of what keeps the sad sad and the fat fat. If you would take a moment to show some compassion for those with ailments that you clearly don't…

Finally, a solution to world hunger!

But what about beer made from Uranus?

Side Effects of Moondust Beer is 'minimal'

But that stuff's pure poison. Everyone who drinks that will get deathly ill.

You fools.