@'Suss—: You know what really chaps my ass though? I spent my life savings turning my van into a dog. The alarm alone cost me two hundred.

Fuckin' basketball players blowin' chunks everywhere. I've never seen anything like it, and I live in L.A.

@Burning_River: I've always been scared of that game. I'd rather be sober and a dork than dead from alcohol poisoning by the end of the first quarter. But if it thins the herd a little, I'm gonna have to approve.

Dorenzo Hudson did impress. He gave them spaghetti, I think. We'll see if he can keep it down next time. -VTtowelcrew4life

@The Legend of Vincent Tremblay: Lobby for the removal of the Budwesier Hot Seat first. Start chipping away at the little things, and funnel the freed up time to Van Pelt and Buccigross.

The Regional Governors will easily keep the local systems in line once the Senate is dissolved.

"Stewart's been long overdue for a buffet, what better time than before he eats you?" -fatguyinalittlecoat

This is why I was never motivated to take up basketball as a child. That, and "White Men Can't Jump".

@DGatRFK: Linda Cohn is the perfect mix all female sports journalists should aspire to: both feminine yet knows her stuff.

@Creepy Old Man: I think so. He was a sports anchor during the first season.

"Charles Nelson Reilly isn't drunk yet? What's up with that?" -matchgame76

@Tuffy: ...Stephanie agrees to hold a package for Michael Irvin until he can pick it up "when the heat's off".

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Stephen A. went 0 for 11; everybody should applaud the vending machine company that stopped stocking Cheez Doodles in the machines.

"What could tWWL's mods have been thinking when they chose their own comments for the Comment of the Day?" -Ridin'DeadSpinnaz

Damn. No words to describe it.

Jesus, I'd better get the Goddamn paperwork started on my Foundation for A Better Gene Pool.

Skip Bayless: lover of sports with balls and rooster. The only person who couldn't see this coming is Stevie Wonder, and that's only because he doesn't give a damn.

@Carlton_Whitfield: It's kind of a Daffy Duck thing. He wants people to understand one thing about his blog: "It's mine, you understand? Mine, all mine!!!"

Stephen, Stephen, Stephen, I (and most people) don't hate you because you're black or because you wear your BLACKNESS proudly...I hate you because you're a loudmouthed asshole with an inferiority complex, and you come off on TV looking like an angry muppet.