Ummm okay.

I don't want to be feminist if it means I have to bond with my period blood. I also don't want to be a doctor because I'd have to accept that other people bleed.

Everyone has got to get their PHd in something in this new economy. With a Doctorate in Bro, just think about all the bars and frats you'll be qualified to run.

Go pull on your dick. No one likes you. Your mom wishes she you were a girl so she could finally have her basement back.

Your lack of vagina prevents you from relating to the joke.

Well, I think it's a stretch to say men play Lara Croft's character because they can relate. I mean, I like James Bond films, but my vagina isn't tingling because I'm thinking about becoming a super spy.

I can in fact perform every move that Chun Li can perform. When I had a one-night stand with Spiderman, he was stuck in his web on the ceiling for a week after I took a spin on his dick.

I wouldn't want to be accused of plagarism. I think the United States already bought that book deal when they signed and ratifed The Constitution of Florida.

That's right my beetchus, Kirsten is a sweet ole girly girl politics. She'll suck your dick and eat it too!

Meh, I've had funnier jokes. Plus, picking on Jersey is easier than taking candy from a baby after it flicks you off. I mean, Jersey jokes are so obvious its like your mom won't shut up about them- just a yammering, yammering, yammering in your ears that you just feel a ringing, ringing. I mean, sometimes I just feel…

Well, Princeton is in Jersey, so picking the right restaurant is the most popular class offered there, to be fair.

Of all the things that can make a marriage fail, I'm pretty sure having a regular college education when your wife has an Ivy is not one of them.

That's quite an either-or. Crying or ejaculating? I mean, shit, add in blowing his nose and you've really covered all of his clear fluids.

This is one of the best hacker ideas you've ever had on here.

Is it filled with naked women because it's as bad as his last single?

Grandma's Boy is fucking great.

They are the worst fucking thing possible and the person who came up with them should be drug into a street and shot. Then, their family members should be drug out and shot too. Get rid of the whole fucking gene pool. Motherfuckers.

The one thing I would like, which has very little to do with transgender rights specifically, but is inspired by the inclusion of allowing them to join either sports team:

Yay.

Yes, you are correct that educators are doing some things. But women are not on the verge of winning the war.