It's good that you're here talking to us and willing to learn. I just wanted to open with that. But I think "uncertain" is a pretty forgiving term for people who believe it's okay to ignore if someone says "no" or "stop" if you've been in a relationship for a while or you're married or if you've spent a lot of money…

The arguments against it seem to mostly be about pearl-clutching, not time. I get your worries, but I really don't think this "slippery slope" into there suddenly not being enough time for science or math is not going to be an issue. It's thirty seconds on a basic topic. Better kids find out in school than in porn. I…

And when did I ever say that he had to listen to me or change?

Obviously you don't or you wouldn't be defending a logically flawed stance.

What does that have to do with the fact that it takes about thirty seconds to explain? Is that too long? Or is there an actual reason you take issue with this?

It's not instructional. It's thirty seconds to explain that some people have fetishes and that's fine. It could help end some confusion in kids. I don't really get why you'd be against that. There's time for a paragraph. I've demonstrated that many times. What other problem could you possibly have with it?

It's not whining, it's criticism. I'm saying that the argument of "Well, it's just his creation" (which is your argument - that's why people are responding to it) doesn't cut it. Lots of people create things, it doesn't mean they're immune to criticism.

No one's saying he has to do anything. We're criticizing his works. If you don't want a work of art criticized, don't create art. Nothing exists in a vacuum. You can't shield a work from criticism just because you like it.

No one's saying he *has* to do anything. We're criticizing his works. If you don't want your work of art criticized, don't create art, because you can't escape it.

Other people have covered your other questions, but of course this isn't endemic to the male "species." You guys aren't a species, you're a group that has had systematic and institutional power over us for centuries and for some reason, a lot of you refuse to recognize that as a problem. The result of this is that…

Because if a guy has to mutter it from 20 feet away first, he probably knows it's not cool to say to my face. It's not a compliment when someone screams, "Nice tits!" to me from an open car window. That's pretty obvious as they speed away, trying to avoid any consequences. They knew their behavior was unacceptable,…

This is 9th grade, which is high school. These kids are 14-15, not 13. Of course you cover the basics first, but a quick mention of fantasy and fetishes can prevent kids who do (or do not) have these types of fantasies understand that it's normal. That lots of people have them and that it's okay to play them out, but…

If you're going to talk about sex, you talk about masturbation. It's just basic. If you're going to talk about masturbation, you have five seconds to mention fantasy.

Judging by the writing of that godawful book, I doubt James is capable of a plot so sophisticated.

Nah. If you're covering sex, you should cover masturbation. If you're covering masturbation, you should cover fantasy. I don't think there's any harm in knowing that it exists and that it can be practiced in a safe way. No one's handing them a shibari manual.

Maybe not strung up...she might like that. But definitely set straight somehow. How hard would it have been to talk to a kinkster or do a google search on how to safely practice this stuff before writing?

Yeah, I'll never really get vanilla people, I guess. Like who could live with just plain vanilla sex all the time? There's only so many vanilla positions... I'm not into BDSM really. Too intense for my blood. I'm not into inflicting that much pain. D/s though? All day, every day.

Nope. Not before I was 14-16. I knew I liked being in control and all that, but I had no idea it was part of normal sexual behavior. I think there was a little extra shame for me because, even when kink is discussed, it very rarely includes anything about my preferred power dynamic (dominant woman, submissive man).…

Seeing? Where are you seeing that? Just mentioning it doesn't mean that there are pictures of how to use them and stuff.

Yup. I had the choice about whether or not my parents knew taken from me, too. I confided in a boy who I was seeing at the time and he thought it was weird (mostly because mainstream understanding of kinky stuff has the man as the dominant partner and the woman as the submissive, which is not my dynamic). So he told…