Nice to see Chris Pratt getting gout and about.

More raisist than sexist but whatever.

This is outstanding. I’m actually genuinely thrilled for this and hope that he has a long, long career running the Lakers.

This is overblown. He’s got a lot to learn but he’ll have AIDS.

“That’s can’t possibly be our client: he hasn’t hit anyone all year.”

It was undoubtedly the rich guy and, without any suggestion or coaching by my attorney, I also want to say that I am 99% certain that he was acting within the scope of his duties as an employee such that his employer, who happens to have a ten-figure net worth, may be liable for his actions.

NFL doctors agree the two men are not suffering from concussions.

I understand all the hysteria, but let’s take it easy on this guy: he is single-handedly responsible for one of the only satisfying climaxes to a Chargers game this season.

Take your star, you jerk.

And now he’s going to be disqualified for having the runs.

they also both potentially employ a rushin’ leader

I hope they go undefeated and score 1,000 points per game. I hope they melt the arenas in which they play because they make the ball move so beautifully, and so quickly, that the air becomes super-heated with the vigorous masturbation of the assembled angelic hosts of heaven. I hope Kevin Durant, Steph Curry, Klay…

Sorry, but a black guy getting bad reception in the Boston area doesn't qualify as shocking news

Man, he’s gonna be pissed when someone reads this article to him.

Reggie must have said this 10 times during the game. I kept waiting to see if any of his “puns” would eventually meet the criteria of actually being puns.

Mostly the lack of Baelish.

Milo, unless the entirety of your post depends on getting a reference that I missed

Wow, look at that incompetent figurehead strutting around like he’s doing something of value. Like he’s actually respected by anyone. How do you not have the self-awareness to realize that you suck at your job so much? That you should just quit while you’re behind? Seriously, just show some fucking dignity at this…

It's a macguffin.

HEY THEY ARE KICKING FROM THE 35 YARD LINE INSTEAD OF THE 30! THAT'S 5 LESS YARDS THE BALL HAS TO TRAVEL BEFORE IT CAN BE RECO-What? That rule was changed? Wouldn't that mean kickoffs will mostly sail out of the endzone and transition right back into a 2 minute commercial break? It does but no one cares?