Better a sheep shearer than a sheep shanker.

Truly a giant among men, though he might take issue with your avatar and nom de plume.

Back through his lineage, an oompa-loompa lurks.

I have a friend who bought one of these new with a solid roof and a manual transmission. He was able to drive around town for a week on 2 gallons of gas (small town obviously). It gave its life to protect him and his future wife when he rolled it end for end on a rainy night. He loved that car. This ain't that car…

In another strange juxtaposition, "cuntasaurus" was "Fighting Joe" Hooker's favorite private insult for George B. McClellan.

Meriweather was also accused by Clark of having shot him in the ass in 1806 while supposedly aiming at a grizzly bear somewhere in Washington.

When will the tide of revolution sweeping the domains of the world's bloated and corrupt hegemons inspire the youth of the land of FIFA to exile this excrescence?

As this is just a step or two up from fat bastards drunkenly kicking a ball, I think the way around this is to claim that defender/manager/equipment manager/parking attendant/custodian Ashley Vickers is also the Head of Security. Then it would be his job to tackle and teabag pitch invaders like he was a Pittsburgh…

Maybe you should consider dipping into your "strategic calorie reserve" that you have stored on your person. I personally have a somewhat substantial reserve.

Guys in administration, higher ups, sneaking off for coffee...

Can't forget Dick Vermeil crying - that's classic stuff.

Snyder had a perfectly reasonable explanation:

I'd have the hood replaced and ask to have lifetime oil replacements for free, but what a great story to tell around the water cooler. I don't see there how there would be any damage to the suspension from this. I'm also a bit biased, as the wife and I bought a 2010 about eight months ago and really like it a lot.

[www.zefrank.com]

I spent many a mile in a silver 1981 Dasher diesel wagon in high school - that center console picture brings back happy memories. I will not, however, pay 10k for those happy memories. CP.

@TheReno This is one of the greatest posts I've ever read on a Gawker site. Well done, and I'd promote it if I could.

I hate seeing these dumbass articles about how much our favorite pro athletes make and how unfair it all is. It is a business, and we the fans are the market supporting that business. Do we moan incessantly about the money top actors make, or hedge fund managers, or Nick Denton? You should not be promoting this…

Here's an option from our Swedish friends.

[cincinnati.craigslist.org] 1979 Chevy Monza