@Nasal Sacks: Brick Top is clearly at fault here as well.

@Gourmet Spud: His Aunt Maternity sides with all the other players though.

@MarkKelsosMigraine: Jefferson Starship? (or was it just Starship at that point?)

I wonder if hair boy carried on over to his back - then he'd have a hair tabard. Additionally, dude had to shave his left shoulder - how bad is that?

Is there a tax break with "gormless self-depreciation"? If so, I must know immediately.

Your equating sports media folks to the chefs and the players to the ingredients completely messes up my "bayless leaf" pun.

The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. It was there when Michael came out with "Thriller" and "Bad" and his endless string of hits that helped…

And here's how the donations will happen:

Crabtree: I... I might take the deal you left on the table.

It shocks me to discover that anyone tuned in to all things gay would be behind Cincinnati when it came to cultural trends. If you can call cornhole a cultural trend, that is.

@UkraineNotWeak: But mess up his hair and he deflates like a hissing balloon.

@Eamus Catuli: I believe he was banging out a birth announcement for little Waitle Nex Yeare.

6. The Steel Curtain is the worst metaphor ever.

PETA would probably be satisfied if the bull were replaced with this:

@UkraineNotWeak: Everybody's Working for the Weekend

This would be exhibit #1 on why the Welsh are such good rugby players - even the women can stop a 4,000 pound juggernaut with their faces. The Limeys don't stand a chance against that.

"Mr. Bennett? Rush Limbaugh is on line 3, something about coming to write for his show?"

@Phony Gwynn: +1 Lowly Worm

@Stev D: Fact: Every time George Steinbrenner said "hello" to him, Bud Selig wrote it down on the free calendar he got from the funeral home.

The St. Pölten Anschluss just might be more appropriate.