Bitch Media did it already! https://www.bitchmedia.org/article/the-dream-multi-level-marketing-schemes

I genuinely hope no one ever fucks you again.

That entitlement is power.

Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m really sorry that happened to you.

Ohhhh, you're a troll. I missed that the first time.

I don't think all of anything is one thing. I think manipulation can be used as a tactic of control and thus, a way of justifying violence. But qualifying anything as all one thing is harmful and useless and far from the point here.

If you read any of my other comments or replies, you'd see that I'm trying to expand this conversation about what is or is not domestic violence outside of the realm of the criminal justice system. I'll say it again: the legal and criminal justice systems do not adequately support, protect, or provide justice for…

Financial abuse is a form of domestic violence, sure. The context of how that plays out in the relationship is what's important to determine whether or not it's domestic violence. Thinking about it in terms of "annoying control" vs. "coercive control" can be helpful. I wasn't saying philandering is violence, but it…

Yeah, except that the same rules don't apply to both men and women because we don't live in a society that is equal or equitable. Ignoring the thousands of years in which we've been socialized to believe in inherent inequality, and that women's value is attached to their subservience to men, has resulted in systems…

And yes, I was focusing primarily on heterosexual relationships. I'm well aware of the increased rates within more marginalized communities, especially sexual and gender minorities, which has largely been a failing of the domestic and sexual violence community (although getting slightly better).

If you look at the sub-data of that study, that speaks to the level of danger, threat, and lethality experienced by women vs. men. In fact, on the call about using that data right after it came out, the CDC and other advocates were very critical of using the data in a way that made it look like it's the same thing.…

No, of course not. Because domestic violence is a form of gender-based violence, meaning it happens significantly more often to women by men. Furthermore, on the very rare occasions when it does happen by women to men the level of danger, threat, and lethality is far, far less. Jack Nicholson is a man with…

I don't know about you, but I don't consider "expressing the full range of one's sexuality" to include lying and cheating. That's not healthy sexuality; that's being an entitled, manipulative asshole.

Socio-cultural norms and entitlement to power are both pieces of the movement's language, and yes, the simplest way to get the vast majority of people to understand an incredibly complex issue. I'm sure if we were having a debate in person, we could expound on what and how more fully, but this IS the internet.

That's interesting that the fact sheet from that study uses the 'single-time' definition without a mention of power. I have a lot of problems with the way they've disseminated information about that study and I guess that's another I can bring up—there was a different discussion and definition on the call about using…

I did. That's...the definition I used in my original post. "A pattern of behaviors used to hold and maintain power and control over an intimate partner." It's a pared down definition from a much longer one developed out of the Oregon Council on Domestic and Sexual Violence (also often used by the CDC as well,…

In my (nearly a decade of advocacy, education, prevention and policy) experience, domestic violence is always a pattern, in some way. This particular circumstance sounds like an isolated incidence of violence, which is why it's inappropriate to call it "domestic violence." Was she right or justified to use violence?…

I'm using a policy/public health definition; not a legal/criminal justice one. And that's intentional.

Is this assault? Sure. Not domestic violence, though. Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used to hold and maintain power and control over an intimate partner—something I would argue he did far more of with his cheating and lying than she did in this isolated incident of violence. Domestic violence is not…

All of those ideas are lovely in theory, but how do you think most women would be branded in their own communities if they proposed to their boyfriend? Desperate. Over eager. Shackling him to the ball and chain. They're idiotic and archaic cultural norms, but they still exist. So I don't think it's super helpful to…