As a newspaper editor for 15 years, there is no way would a judge would agree with the attorneys if they are text messaging it to each other. They could bluster and write angry letters. But a judge would usually laugh at a couple of judges making fun of their clients, and say tough shit.

Crawfordsville, Indiana, is also home to Wabash College, an all-boys Division III school. Going to an all-boys college is #2. The nearby towns are great examples of the history of the region—named Whitesville, Browns Valley and Roachdale—which is also examples of how it is #2.

7. Tar

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This is why adults shouldn’t have nice things. On my Little League team, the kids run up to the other players to make sure they are okay after they plunk ‘em. I do not teach them this. This is their first instinct.

I would, but I lazy Kinja.

Oil Can Boyd

Who here would also secretly be proud of Fox for adding Curt Schilling to the NASCAR team?

“I almost read the whole thing, but stopped just short.”

Grow gardens not grass*.

High school sports story: the other coach kept yelling from the dugout that I was a “nothing pitcher,” so my old, wobbly coach limped out to the mound and told me this: the other coach is an asshole, and to not be confused, because assholes always think being an asshole is important. Then he limped back and took his…

I had a friend one summer who kept using the word “diesel” to mean “good” or “interesting.” I was living at his dank place in Providence though, so I couldn’t say anything.

You’re probably right. I just had to share something from that two hours, in church pews, listening to rules.

Went to my Little League coaching meeting last night and they told us this rule. The base path is 3 feet on either side of the runner’s path as soon as he starts to the base. So technically, you could hit a home run, and go about circling the bases this way: you run down the first base line all the way to the right…

Symbolism.

it makes my salary look like what, crushed eggshells? mouth dust?

“But who stole the possessive apostrophe?” — GenX mfers like me who won’t start a new company or invent anything.

It was 1997 and we were in high school. I drank a two liter of $3 Purple Passion — we’d go into drug stores and swap labels with purple soda — and then we drove around in my friend’s Bronco all night going to basement parties. The drug store shit was nasty, and when combined with cheap Hy-Vee beer I drank at every…