I smell bullshit. Anyone who has done either knows that for the most part, breastfeeding is way less time consuming than preparing a bottle. 

One year when I was a young kid my dad, being an early riser, came pounding on our bedroom door saying we were going to be late for the bus. We all freaked out and ran downstairs. It was Saturday, April 1, and he had made pancakes. How is this hard, internet dipshits?

If you want the tea on that royal feud, Nicole Cliffe has you covered:

This is how I imagine their wedding:

AAAAAAHHHHHH, MY CHILDHOOD!!! <throws adult man-baby food from high chair>

I listened to all of The Dropout and just finished the documentary. I preferred the podcast. Every time she was on screen in the doc, I had to look away. She’s fucking creepy. She would probably stab someone with that blank look her face and then lie about how they ran into the knife. All with that fake, deadpan bro…

I love when Cynthia Nixon-as-Nancy asks if she’s going too far with the accent and Liz says no

GO YOU! I broke the cycle and I have a 2o year old daughter who has self-esteem from here to eternity. She knows how loved, supported, and respected she is, and our relationship is really strong. Being a great mom can be incredibly healing.

My 80 year old dad never changed a diaper or spent much time with us. He is now so consumed with guilt and regret, and often talks about the great relationships my brothers have with their kids. He’s trying really hard with the grandkids, but gets pretty overwhelmed with the younger ones, because he never learned any…

How is it possible that nobody in a medical facility noticed that a patient in their care was pregnant?

My mind went here:

How the fuck did no one notice that she stopped menstruating? Do they just let women in a vegetative state freebleed?? Or did no one check or notice? No one takes blood tests regularly? What care was this woman receiving?

Because locking animals who need to be out in the African plain into cages and small habitats makes them behave in unusual ways? Imprisonment tends to do that.

Depending on the location you may need high cut bloomers to be above the incision. Low cut underwear weren’t low enough for me.

My infant who wore Pampers didn’t know who Elmo was and didn’t care. I switched to store brand a while back when the pampers started leaking and those just have stars or squares.

If Roma Downey didn’t throw a punch and then yell, “You just got touched by an angel bitch!” she really missed a golden opportunity.

Completely with Messing. DO shut the FUCK UP, Susan. 

My mom hated that she ever allowed us to watch that movie. Every night at dinner for weeks after it was something like, “Broccoli and corn with hamburgers? Get it out of here!”

Get it out of here!