All these years later, have they ever resolved that bike rack issue? I'm dying to know.

Did you even take a helicopter ride?

Usually, it's you, Coach K.

And this is why LA does not have pro football.

Let me get this straight, ESPN. You can't say "circumcising mosquitoes" three times on PTI but you can show an uncircumcised prick for an hour a day on SportsNation?

Rooney just wants to bang a Radcliffe girl.

Berman hasn't been involved in an Arizona Swingoff since that night in Scottsdale.

Now, who is ESPN going to fellate 24/7?

Back in the day, Will Leitch would've paid anything for a topless photo of a post coital Woody Allen.

I believe Bornstein earned his bonus from his Mexican League team tonight.

RIP Nick Charles.

Pour one out for The Big Man.

In other sad news:

It would've been alright if he'd been wearing a thong.

I have a feeling this is what Mitt Romney was like as a kid.

Not "Thank Heaven for Little Girls" from Gigi?

Later on, there was a story about Mike Piazza and she began humming the theme from Glitter.

And the Heat are own by a Jew. This is the time on Sprockets when they dance.

Imagine what Anthony Weiner would do with it.

Nice Pacific rims.