All this modern music is so disgusting.

I'm not a dude and I stand by what I said! They had a baby, she gave birth.

Yes, a couple is expecting a baby, they also can be having a baby (because they are, they did make it together after all). A couple is not pregnant, a couple does not give birth. I find this kind of phrasing really takes away from the respect ladies should be getting for having to go through hell to produce these…

James Van Der Beek and his wife have just given birth to....
No, no, no. The wife gave birth, just as she was pregnant and not the both of them. Let's quit that kind of bullshit phrasing.

Now listen, if you don't drink soda, do not chime in with "that's why I don't drink it" or "glad I don't drink it" because fuck you, okay? This is not about you. This is about us, the people who love soda."

Best line from a Jezebel article or Greatest line from a Jezebel article?

This is the most attractive mugshot in the history of ever.

Cool as millennials think they are, they are light years behind in every aspect and every category (except for animated gifs, their greatest contribution)

That looks crazy fun. If I had a time machine and could go back to when I was 23 and had no responsibilities or husband or pets, I would do that in a heart beat. Alas.

Jean-Baptiste Chandelier sounds like the name of a Will Ferrell character. A French art thief who collects bassoons and wears a ferret on his shoulders.

Showtime has an app for subscribers that lets them view their shows, perhaps even full seasons, on an iPad. Direct TV and Comcast offer similar apps.

My grandparents (73 & 74) are both very active on Facebook and I'm happy they are. It's actually really awesome because they are able to keep up with what goes on with myself & my siblings, and they are the source of endless wonderful comments on pictures & statuses that I post. My grandfather actually signs…

There are so many problems with this shirt. The copy editor in me just wants to curl up and die.

These two need to battle in an epic Douche-Off.

Omg I am watching it now from the Lifetime app (YES I DOWNLOADED THAT SHIT) and the first ad was for the Lizzie Borden movie. Let's just say I squealed a little with excitement when I saw Christina Ricci stars. GOD BLESS LIFETIME.

Retouched for vogue

So if I have seen Rick Wakeman and the Court of King Arthur than I actually will OWN gawker?

It's the Universal Dream. :)

You know it! Conform or be cast out...

It does make us insecure when we aren't necessary for this purpose.