"Tiny Conan! What is the little Riddle of Steel?"

Heck, I just want the adorable teeny-tiny anvil. Who knew they made those? Besides cobbler elves, I mean.

Lens flare to be added in post.

Yeah, hanging a lampshade on the idiotic plot point ("That was probably a bad idea") doesn't make it any less retarded.

That looks hilariously terrible.

No hablo Franglish.

Just out of curiosity, can it get me from New England to Tierra del Fuego?

Well played indeed.

I just remembered the cool bike Jet Li had in War. I had to look it up; turns out it's a real bike, the Confederate Hellcat. Which, you have to admit, is a badass name.

How about Streethawk? It's neck-and-neck with Airwolf for the title of "supermachines named after animals in the wrong domain."

Yippie ki yay, mothertrucker!

Obligz:

Shit, I can't argue with math. The numbers are right there.

This is how we did aerobics in the 80s. Suck it, Zumba.

All of that is perfectly fine. Art is personal; if it weren't, we'd all agree on everything. I'm just annoyed that people are claiming that Interstellar is super-smart when it is demonstrably not (which is a different issue from whether it moved you emotionally), and Christopher Nolan piling on by condemning those of…

No it's not. Just wait, you'll see.

As George Carlin once said, "Think how stupid the average person is... then realize half of them are stupider than that."

Because they DON'T.

Did the designer run out of inspiration or the builder run out of money? Anyone can stick a hat rack on a Roomba and call it a day.

I don't know, man, that new iPhone 6 is pretty big. That could crush a kid. He'd be all, "I'll just take this call in my crib" — like his actual crib — and BAM! Smashed flat by the iPhone 6.