At one point in graduate school, I was so depressed that I didn't know what to do (in part because of subtle sexual harassment and inability to progress in my research due to avoiding the people who were harassing me). I went to the university's counseling services and the counselor asked if I had any pets, since that…

You do realize that Planned Parenthood will actually help you become a parent if that is what you desire, yes?

No. I would not accept that by random fluke, my credit was screwed up. I'd work diligently to fix it, and I would expect the mortgage company to appreciate that I was the victim of a crime.

You may think that they treat all of the students the same, but there are definitely a small percentage of professors who treat the girls differently. It's subtle, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. (I have enough graduate hours in mechanical engineering for a little more than half of a masters degree.)

Actually, I've found that sexist asshole students grow up into sexist asshole coworkers. And just because the administration is trying to recruit women into the program with scholarships doesn't mean that the good old boy professors think their female students can actually do the work.

There's nothing terribly surprising about girls being good at math and yet avoiding computer science. It's not aptitude that keeps women out of male-dominated fields; it's men.

When my ex dumped me, I had a pet rat that he loved dearly, and I made sure that he lost contact with her immediately because I didn't want him deriving any comfort from her. He hurt me so badly, and I wanted to get back at him just a little bit.

Eee, I love him! He sounds like my dog!

My brother has a term for these sorts of 'fake' people, and it's far more descriptive:

Well. At least the dog and the baby are both cute. Surprisingly chatty, but cute.

As a graduate student, my current income - $15k is -$600. This is not a very useful guideline.

I am also crazy allergic to Christmas trees. My mother used to love real trees, but I was so sick as a kid, she's had artificial for years. No amount of advertising could induce me to buy a real tree. And, in fact, the number of real Christmas trees they erect in church for the holidays generally keeps me out of…

I really don't like those shoes and I feel kind of guilty admitting it.

When my fellow physicists and I make Dippin' Dots, we have to warn people to LET THEM WARM UP before they are eaten. A fresh batch requires about 20-30 minutes before it can be eaten without pain, and school groups for whom we have done demonstrations have gotten all giggly about the idea of letting ice cream warm up.

Mrowr.

Yay, Paul Rudd! I love Paul Rudd so very very much.

My ex's mother was a tiny little woman. Petite in stature and quite tiny and slender. The sort of woman who would cook an enormous country breakfast and then eat none of it because she couldn't stand to gain an ounce. According to my ex, she "worked her whole life to be small."

Since Weight Watchers works off the glycemic index, it wouldn't be a bad idea, really!

Not only that, those aren't tetris, which is a configuration of four squares.

LB is pretty bad on the frump. You really have to dig to find something nice.