Ooo, I like that one, too.

That is precisely what this situation (ie, the next four years) calls for.

These are sober times. The more blunt approach may be best.

THANKS, TRUMP.

(We can say that now, right? Please let me have this.)

This is so good. Way to go, kids!

How long until the whole Trump gang decamps to Argentina?

Handwriting is not taught anymore. My high schooler doesn’t have a signature. My eighth grader’s scrawl looks like a muuuuuuuch younger child’s. This degree of penmanship is completely typical for an adolescent in 2016.

Edit: And also the attempting to conceal thing.

Hey, his art skills are really coming along! I bet his teacher will choose one of those to display at the school district office for the month of December, alongside the work of other talented tenth graders!

Water balloons full of it. Can you imagine if 100,000 saved the collections from our precious Diva cups to turn against Vice Voldemort? It would be like that festival in Spain with the tomatoes, only infinitely more likely to raise an eldritch demon goddess to avenge us.

That would be kewl! And they’ll look smashing with our pantsuits.

See you there, shitass lesbians!

Edit: .... or was it lesbian shitasses? Oh dear, now I’ve thought myself right out of fierce mode.

I’m sorry for your woes, but thank you for the laugh.

I had a similar experience in Thailand, when my travel constipation finally collapsed beneath the strain of a week’s worth of some of the spiciest food on the planet. I was so ashamed of what came out of my body.

I just hysterical-scared-laughed at that sentence. It was an unsettling noise. That we must now put our hope in Lindsay Graham... Oh god, I did it again. That noise.

God, look at that. Obama is so chill and relaxed, and poor Donny looks as shellshocked as the rest of us feel. He is in sooooooo far over his head.

The good news is that we see this for the fledgling Fourth Reich it is. We have the gift of history showing us this is how it starts. We will not be complacent. We will not be silent.

We’re going to need you Brexit survivors to talk us through the coming weeks as we muddle through this.

I don’t know, but that’s something we’ll explore soon. Everything in solidarity from now on. I’m so sad, but grimly determined to be there on behalf of all our sisters and brothers who will need allies now more than ever.

Exactly. They showed us who they are. They showed us precisely who they are. They hate. I will not hate back, but neither can I trust that they have any sense of goodwill towards women and minorities. It’s time for me to protect my family, then get to work protecting the vulnerable members of our society.

Thank you. I’m already over the deluge of “come together and loooooove” posts on social media. No. Not today. Today is for tears and grief and confronting that a person who has promised walls and deportations and isolation and punishments for women is in the position to make all of our nightmares come true. I don’t…

I have moved on to the stage of water and snot free-flowing from my face in an unrelenting torrent.

Your lips to god’s ears!