If you haven’t already, watching/listening to Timothy Olyphant’s appearances on Conan O’Brien’s various talk shows and podcast is also incredibly enjoyable.

Chidi Anagonye was right.

Here I am forty or so years later excited for next Halloween, now that I have just moved into a house and have learned about Pepper’s ghost on the internet. My experiments after reading the book were sadly unsuccessful. 

“If you’re not caught up on the animated side of the Star Wars universe, the black sword Moff Gideon uses to cut himself out of his downed ship at the end of the episode is a Big Deal, capitol B, capitol D.”

#stickingtosprouts

Should this get back to Garth I hope you’re ready for the responsibility of sending him out the way Elvis went. 

“This angers me to no end because these cretins obviously mean Alfredo but care so little about anything that they don’t know the difference between a noodle and the cheese sauce they devour.”

If you enjoyed these, you’ll love the parody Denny’s menus I made for a photoshop contest years ago:

Those are excellent. I will assume Don Cherry Cola is offscreen.

There was a David Letterman skit around the time of Toad the Wet Sprocket where he had written verbs, nouns, and adjectives on dice and rolled them to come up with band names. My college roommate and I tried it to name our film school production company and came up with Ask the Young Saxophone, which we went as far as…

You can’t just shit on the floor and make it disappear. 

I don’t remember enough of the TV show to remember that episode but I loved the Little House book with the blizzard in it. It even has a “recipe” in it - when they are unable to have their usual Christmas candy so Ma pours maple syrup onto snow. 

In luxurious teak with artisan-dusted glitter. Only $349.95.

“There are movie quotes on every card, and the thieves can stymie McClane by schießen die Fenster...”

Add in his wonderfully vulgar turn as LBJ in The Crown, and he’s had quite a year!

The avocado. It was the focal point of so many cultural flash points - generational antipathy against millennials, panics about shortages potentially caused by deportations ad tariffs, using peas as a substitute in guacamole, just to name a few. 

“Can the human body sustain on pie alone?”

I’ve seen quite a few movies more than once while they were in theaters but 12 Monkeys is the only movie I’ve seen more than once in a theater on the same day. I went with one of my college roommates and on the way back from the theater we ran into our other roommate, who was pissed we saw it without him, so we went…

Perhaps she could teach him how to throw a dinner party when all you have in the fridge is leftovers while he discusses the futility of hope in an indifferent universe. 

Just John Locke and Keegan Key glowering at each other baldly for an hour a week.