Dam, son!

“To that end, we have hired attorney Rusty Hardin to assist us.”

Me, trying to get the chainsaw to start again when I’m one hedge from finishing trimming.

My childhood dentist actually gave out coupons for a free scoop at the soda fountain across the street (wow, that might be the most old-timey sentence I’ve ever uttered). Even as a kid it felt weird. Like my teeth are all clean and a little sensitive, the last thing I want is ice cream. Going to the pharmacy after a…

And Harrison Ford will be older than the old Indiana Jones guy was.

Oof!

My other favorites - we are now further from Star Wars than Star Wars was from The Wizard of Oz (and next year will be the same distance as Star Wars was from Flash Gordon) and we are further from the start of World War II than World War II was from the end of the Civil War.

“On an 0-1 pitch from Miami’s Robert Dugger, the Reds rookie smoked one into the stands in left for his 14th dinger of the month...”

Here’s a game I like to play to torture myself. It’s now longer since Dumb & Dumber came out than it was from Dumb & Dumber to when MASH (the movie) came out. 

“That poor butter-fingered guy is sophomore quarterback Dorian Thompson-Robinson, who was named the team’s starter earlier this week.”

Wonderful! I had been dreading that the Deadcast was the latest victim of the folderol. Looking forward to listening to it on my way home. It is also worth noting that Kirk Hamilton’s Strong Songs is my favorite new podcast this year. He is so knowledgeable and has a gentle passion for music that is highly infectious.

There are times where contract articles get so deep into the weeds that I feel like at any moment the author might say, “But the Texans’ Maverick can trade lumber for agriculture credits.” and it wouldn’t sound any more made up.

Hasn’t happened so far in the US.

Carly Simon is so far gone she dreams she sees clouds in her coffee.

Except I would more trust my sister’s annoying boyfriend to QB my team.

If they hire all four I think we have those four horsemen who were due to show up any day now.

Get the defibrillator, because I’m in cardiac Aristedes!

I always get them mixed up. I thought she was Peter Pan.

I thought Dumusois’ reply was relatively understated all things considered:

At the end of the block I used to live on there was an H Salt and a Fatburger in the same shopping center. If I hadn’t moved, I probably would be dead by now.